Cosima's Diaries
Recordings by Cosima Wagner between 1869 and 1883
Cosima Wagner kept her diaries from 1 January 1869 at Tribschen until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, so that Siegfried would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: Wagner’s talk, his dreams, the evening readings, the music, the visitors, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear him thinking aloud for so long. The diaries follow the Tribschen idyll, the building of the Bayreuth festival theatre and the composition of Parsifal.
The entries are arranged by year and month and each can be opened on its own page. The sections below trace the main lines of the diaries.
Cosima Wagner began her diaries at Tribschen on 1 January 1869 and kept them until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, and above all for Siegfried, so that he would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: what Wagner said at breakfast, his dreams, the evening readings of Shakespeare, Calderón and Goethe, the music played at the piano, the visitors, illnesses, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear Wagner thinking aloud for so long, or shows so clearly how his ideas moved in his last fourteen years. At Tribschen the household lives in a private idyll, sealed by the birth of a son and by marriage, with the Ring resumed and Nietzsche a frequent guest. From 1872 everything turns to Bayreuth and the building of a festival theatre, achieved through years of fundraising and near collapse. After the 1876 Ring the diaries draw inward to Parsifal, written at Wahnfried and finished on long Italian journeys, while Wagner’s talk reaches toward a religion of compassion drawn from Schopenhauer, Buddhism and the Gospels. The same pages record, often and plainly, the antisemitism of both Wagner and Cosima.
Tribschen. The first pages are a confession. Cosima, who had left Hans von Bülow for Wagner, calls her love “a rebirth, a deliverance,” and writes under a constant sense of guilt toward her husband that she never lost. The years at Tribschen bring the birth of Siegfried in June 1869, her divorce and her marriage to Wagner in the Protestant church at Lucerne on 25 August 1870, the Franco-Prussian War, the essay Beethoven and the completion of Siegfried. On her birthday that Christmas she woke to the Siegfried Idyll played on the staircase. Nietzsche first called on 17 May 1869 and became almost one of the family; his manuscript on the birth of tragedy arrived as a Christmas gift in 1870. Wagner’s remarks already circle the themes of his last years. Music, he said in November 1869, “is the direct product of Christianity, as is the saint,” and the next spring he described the Knight of the Grail as free because “he acts, not in his own behalf, but for others.” If anyone asked whether there was a God, he said in 1870, he would answer that at a moment when thousands are singing to him, “God is alive, he is there.”
Founding Bayreuth. In April 1871 the Wagners first saw Bayreuth; its baroque opera house “will not do for us at all; so we must build.” The foundation stone was laid in the rain on 22 May 1872, Wagner’s birthday, followed by the Ninth Symphony in the old opera house. The next four years are full of patrons, Wagner societies, singers, architects, concert tours and money. A royal loan in 1874 rescued the enterprise, and the family moved into Wahnfried that April. On 21 November 1874 Wagner finished the score of Götterdämmerung, a day Cosima remembered with tears, because he was hurt to find her reading a letter from her father at that moment. In between, Cosima converted to Protestantism on 31 October 1872 and took Communion with Wagner: “I felt as if our bond had only now been truly sealed.”
The first festival. The Ring was given complete for the first time in August 1876, before the German Emperor and much of musical Europe. The diaries record the mishaps as well as the triumph, and the exhaustion afterwards: looking back that November, Wagner said his main feeling during the performances had been “Never again, never again!” The festival left a large deficit, and the autumn in Italy brought two meetings that would shape the coming years: the last time the Wagners spent with Nietzsche, at Sorrento, and the first meeting with Count Arthur de Gobineau in Rome on 30 November.
The Parsifal years. Wagner began Parsifal in earnest in 1877 and finished the prose draft on 28 February (“The Redeemer unchained!” Cosima wrote) and the poem on 19 April. Composing the Communion scene that August, he told her that “this scene of Holy Communion will be the main scene, the core of the whole work.” The music grew slowly through 1878 and 1879 beside the founding of the Bayreuther Blätter, the regenerative essays and campaigns against vivisection, and the widening break with Nietzsche. In 1880 the family moved to Naples, where Paul von Joukowsky joined them as stage designer and the garden at Ravello suggested Klingsor’s magic garden; in Siena that August the cathedral moved Wagner to tears and became a model for the Temple of the Grail. That November he conducted the Prelude privately for King Ludwig in Munich. Gobineau stayed at Wahnfried in 1881, and Wagner read his books on race and on the Persians with growing enthusiasm. The score was finished in Palermo on 13 January 1882. “With this, as with all his other works,” Cosima wrote, “he had feared being interrupted by death.”
The premiere and Venice. Sixteen performances of Parsifal followed in July and August 1882, conducted by Hermann Levi. Wagner asked that the audience not call the singers out after the second act, rebuked a chorister for joking about the bread, and at the last performance took the baton himself for the end of the third act. The family then settled in the Palazzo Vendramin in Venice. The last months bring the news of Gobineau’s death, Liszt’s long visit, Hans von Bülow’s breakdown, and on Christmas Eve a performance at La Fenice of the symphony Wagner had written at nineteen, played as a birthday present to Cosima. He was weakened by repeated heart spasms, and he was still talking about writing symphonies and an essay on the feminine. The last entry, on 12 February 1883, ends with him at the piano playing the Rhinedaughters’ lament: “Extraordinary that I saw this so clearly at that time!”
Spirituality. The diaries are themselves partly a religious document. Cosima wrote under a sense of “unatonable guilt” toward Bülow and turned it into a discipline of renunciation. After her conversion she took Communion regularly, writing in 1873 that “the only true communion with people is before the altar,” and she read Meister Eckhart, Tauler, the Theologia Germanica and the Imitation of Christ (“Non sum! How dearly I should like to make that my motto!”). Her devotion to Wagner took the same form, and she wrote that in him she found “not my happiness, but my salvation.”
Wagner’s own faith was heterodox and he said so. Its foundation was Schopenhauer: “it was Schopenhauer who revealed Christianity to me,” he told Cosima in 1879. Through Schopenhauer came Buddhism and the Vedanta, which run through the diaries from first to last: the Buddhist drama Die Sieger, often planned and never written; the Brahmin saying “tat tvam asi,” which he spoke to Cosima at Christmas 1874; readings of the Bhagavad-Gita, the Upanishads and, in Venice, a new life of the Buddha. He set the two traditions side by side rather than choosing between them. Brahmanism was “the religion of intelligence,” but Christianity stood above it as “the religion of suffering.” Buddhism was “a flowering of the human spirit” with no church and no compulsion, and by studying the Buddha, he said in 1882, “one learns to understand Christianity.” Cosima put the difference in a sentence of her own: “Buddha does not move one, he teaches; Christ teaches by moving.”
At the centre stood Christ, kept apart from the church. “I do not believe in God, but in godliness, which is revealed in a Jesus without sin,” Wagner said in 1879, and he repeatedly complained that people “think only of the church and confuse this with Christianity.” In his last years he said that he recognized “no religion except compassion,” extended to animals as well as people, and this lay behind his vegetarian leanings and his fury at vivisection. Art was to carry what the churches had lost. “Art makes religions eternal,” he said in 1872; music was “the only possible church nowadays”; and in 1879 he gave the core of Religion and Art in a sentence, that religion should “influence ethics, and allow faith to be represented by art, which can transform illusion into truth.” “The path from religion to art bad, from art to religion good,” he noted in 1880.
Parsifal was where these ideas met, and the diaries show how carefully he guarded its tone. He called it “his most propitiatory work” and spoke of it as the dream vision of a rite, not the rite itself. He kept Christ off the stage on principle: “One cannot paint Christ, but one can portray him in music,” and to have Christ sung by a tenor was “a disgusting idea.” What he hoped for from his audience was less instruction than inward change, a recognition of suffering that leads to compassion and resignation. In December 1882 he said he would never again try to explain his ideas on the blood of Christ: “these are things one all of a sudden grasps.” Six weeks later, talking of Nature’s cruelty, he said it went on “until the appearance of the Saviour on the cross,” and added, “in the urge to put an end to the whole of Nature’s will to live.”
Nietzsche. The diaries hold the whole arc of the friendship. Nietzsche arrives in 1869 as a brilliant young professor who “knows R.’s works thoroughly,” spends holidays at Tribschen, writes The Birth of Tragedy under Wagner’s spell and stands beside him at the foundation stone. Cosima noticed early “a dubious streak” in him. The last meetings were at Sorrento in 1876. When Human, All Too Human arrived in April 1878, Wagner resolved not to read it, and by 1879 Cosima wrote that Nietzsche had “committed the one sin which cannot be atoned for, the sin against the Holy Ghost.” In later years Wagner spoke of him with contempt and some sorrow, as a promising mind that the modern world had ruined, while Cosima admitted that she could still remember only his friendly side.
Antisemitism. Hostile remarks about Jews by both Wagner and Cosima recur from the first year to the last, aimed at the press, critics, money, Meyerbeer and the modern theatre. In 1873 Wagner opposed intermarriage in racial terms, and the remarks grow harsher from 1879, when the antisemitic movement gathered in Berlin. That October, reading a speech by Adolf Stoecker, he was “in favor of expelling them entirely.” In December 1881, after the Ringtheater fire in Vienna, Cosima records him making “a drastic joke to the effect that all Jews should be burned at a performance of Nathan der Weise.” From 1881 Gobineau’s racial theories enter the conversation, though Wagner usually set Christianity against them; in June 1881 he was “downright explosive in favor of Christian theories in contrast to racial ones,” and that December he said that races were “done for, and all that can now make an impact is, as I have ventured to express it, the blood of Christ.” He also refused to sign the 1880 petition to Bismarck against the Jews, declined to let the Bayreuther Blätter join the agitation, and complained that nobody had noticed what Know Thyself said about “our own blame for our situation.”
The same diaries show Wagner depending on Jewish colleagues, above all Joseph Rubinstein, Angelo Neumann and Hermann Levi, and they show how that dependence was poisoned. In 1880 Wagner said he could not let Levi conduct Parsifal “unbaptized,” and in 1881 he told him he hoped to find “a formula which will make you feel completely one of us.” When an anonymous letter that summer made Levi ask to be released, Wagner wrote persuading him to return, and Levi conducted every performance in 1882 and was with the family in Venice in February 1883. One of the last entries records Wagner saying that “the Jews, the good ones,” were “condemned to a gently resigned asceticism.”
Because the diaries run to thousands of entries, the table below is a finding aid rather than a summary. Choose a year and month to browse, or search the entries, then open a day to read it in full.
| Date | Word Count | Subject |
|---|---|---|
| January 1, 1872 | 158 | The year opens with a deeply moving surprise: garlanded children wake the narrator with a song and gifts, along with portraits that stir overwhelming gratitude and delight. That joy is quickly shadowed when Lulu falls ill with a fever, pulling the household into worry and care. Amid the domestic strain, there are also signs of intellectual life and support, including news for the Wagner societies and a kind letter from Alwine Frommann. |
| January 2, 1872 | 271 | Lulu survives the night tolerably, while the family also sees a nephew depart in bright weather and receives a letter from Richter. Wagner is buoyed by the piano tuner’s arrival and his own progress on the third act, which lifts the narrator into near-euphoria despite concern for Lulu. The day is marked by a small quarrel over her absence downstairs, followed by his remorse and a tender discussion of love that treats true union as rare and miraculous. |
| January 3, 1872 | 772 | Wagner asks that the previous evening be forgotten, blaming too much beer, and the day brings a new book by Professor Nietzsche along with a touching letter from Malwida von Meysenbug. The narrator is moved to find him tearful over Fidi and exhilarated by the idea that he, too, has lived to see such work and such companionship. Even while Lulu remains ill and practical matters demand attention, the household is energized by the start of the third act and by their evening reading of Nietzsche, which they find splendid and full of promise. |
| January 5, 1872 | 158 | The day begins with Wagner asking the narrator to let go of yesterday’s tension, and he works in a buoyant mood, singing from the Rheingold material as if the house itself were revived by creation. He is delighted by the family life around him and speaks warmly of their marriage and the happiness of remembering earlier hardships from a position of success. That mood is abruptly broken when news arrives that his sister Luise has died, a shock they had not even expected. |
| January 6, 1872 | 272 | The narrator and Wagner continue reading Nietzsche with growing admiration, feeling both solemnity and pleasure as the book deepens their excitement. Much of the day is spent discussing the Bayreuth theater and how a performance space should be shaped, along with Wagner’s ideas for a communal, immersive presentation of Beethoven’s Mass. His work is interrupted by a bad night and Lulu’s illness, but he still calls Nietzsche’s book the one he has been waiting for and is cheered by an anonymous poem from Heidelberg. |
| January 7, 1872 | 126 | A routine letter from the King arrives, and Wagner spends the day working while the narrator writes to family and clears paperwork. A misaddressed letter calling him a theater director in Bayreuth prompts dry amusement, and a remark about Laube leads him to reflect on modernity and artistic ruin. The evening turns serious with the opening of the Oresteia and renewed anger over hostile newspaper comments about her father’s Christus. |
| January 8, 1872 | 111 | Hans’s birthday is noted, though Wagner again has a poor night and the household remains under strain. Unexpected visitors from Bayreuth, banker Feustel and the mayor, bring welcome news and offer a better site for the theater, leading to a decision to move there in the summer. The day ends with the completion of Agamemnon, which Wagner praises not only for its grandeur but for its stone-like craftsmanship. |
| January 9, 1872 | 113 | Wagner remains sleepless and unwell, and a letter from the councilor gives him little pleasure, though he continues to respect the King’s loyalty to the original plan. Despite feeling weak, he returns to work and the couple takes a drive through weather that shifts from sunshine to snow. Their evening reading of the Choephoroi leaves them deeply moved, while criticism of her father’s Christus stokes Wagner’s indignation and his resolve to exclude reviewers from a Vienna concert. |
| January 10, 1872 | 314 | The morning brings another bad night for Wagner, but it also opens into an animated conversation about how musical performance should become participatory rather than passive. He reveals his wish to join a musical performance with the laying of the foundation stone, and the narrator is overjoyed to have independently imagined the same idea. Wagner then plans an ambitious Bayreuth performance of the Ninth Symphony, tends to her financial affairs, writes a warm letter to the sick Nietzsche, and ends the day with the Eumenides. |
| January 11, 1872 | 72 | Wagner is still sleeping badly, yet he keeps working through discomfort and frustration with his persistent physical state. A family lunch and a pleasant letter from Karl Klindworth about the Kaisermarsch offer some comfort, especially since the praise comes from a musician’s point of view. By evening he looks worn out, but he remains absorbed in household plans and the shaping of their house. |
| January 12, 1872 | 219 | R. slept badly again, while a tailor in Milan pressed to work for him and the household received photographs from Munich that pleased him more than me. He stayed absorbed in the house plans and even voiced a dark fear that the King’s death could undo everything. Though I was unwell and still taught the children, the day was threaded through with a deep, almost aching sense of closeness between us, ending in a long discussion of Aeschylus and Shakespeare. |
| January 13, 1872 | 108 | I spent the day thinking about my dress for the foundation-stone ceremony, while R. prepared his speech and kept to his work. He returned from town with an absurd request from De Gubernatis to write music for a dramatic poem, which only added to the day’s odd mixture of seriousness and frivolity. In the evening, Euripides left me cold, though a scene from Iphigenia in Aulis briefly restored my sense of Greek beauty, and R. finished the plans for our house. |
| January 14, 1872 | 125 | Sunday brought letters, sweets from Italy, and news that Wagner societies were spreading in Brussels, Cologne, and Vienna. R. handled bills and business worries, while I wrote letters and tried to keep the children cheerful and lively. That evening Schopenhauer and the thought of Bayreuth’s meaning weighed on my heart, but love remained the only real consolation. |
| January 15, 1872 | 326 | News came that Hans was in Pest and playing even more impressively than before, which pleased us both. R. grew especially animated after reading Schopenhauer, comparing Bach’s fugues to a crystal taking form and dismissing Mozart and Beethoven for treating the genre too lightly. The arrival of the 9th Symphony manuscript filled me with joy, and R. spoke with unusual tenderness about how fully my life has become bound up with his. |
| January 16, 1872 | 201 | The day was filled with editing, correspondence, and the effort to keep a newly printed edition from being ignored. I gave lessons, read to the children, and later argued with R. over the death of Bayard in The Four Sons of Aymon, which led us into a sharper moral debate than either of us expected. By night we were still reading Schopenhauer and talking philosophy long after everyone should have slept. |
| January 17, 1872 | 109 | We discussed how the Ninth Symphony might be performed in Bayreuth, and R. described one recurring theme as if it were a stormy witches’ cauldron. He worked through the day and finally completed the preface to his fifth and sixth collected volumes. A walk in the beautiful weather lifted the mood, and the evening closed with more Schopenhauer and the gift of the second volume of the Renaissance. |
| January 18, 1872 | 115 | After receiving Alpine flora photographs, I wrote to Nietzsche while R. stayed at work. Later, amid family life and a walk with the children, a letter from Clemens brought up the fact that Nietzsche’s book had been misunderstood, and R. answered at length. The day also had a sweet domestic note when Fidi sang almost all of a song, and R. remembered his own early delight in mastering language. |
| January 19, 1872 | 169 | R. worked intensely but complained that composing stole the happiness he wanted to feel with the children. I went out with them in the sunshine, while uncertainty about business matters and the silence from Baron Cohn continued to irritate us. A dead palm tree I had once received from R. struck me with unexpected sadness, though an Indian tale read aloud later soothed everyone’s spirits. |
| January 20, 1872 | 85 | R. told me he had dreamed of my steadiness, though his thoughts kept drifting into astronomical calculations. While I handled the children and he corrected proofs, Nietzsche arrived unexpectedly and delighted us with conversation about the future and school reform. His visit ended with him playing one of his compositions, giving the whole day a bright and stimulating turn. |
| January 21, 1872 | 38 | The fine weather continued, and six of us went for a morning walk before turning to the second act of Götterdämmerung in the afternoon. In the evening we talked about the Werder affair, which still mattered a great deal to us. The day felt calm on the surface, but it was held together by shared work, loyalty, and the depth of our friendships. |
| January 22, 1872 | 191 | Feustel reports that a floor has been rented in the Fantaisie, but the larger building plan is already clouded by money worries. Letters from Cohn and Baron Cohn reveal that the promised subscriptions are far below what had been hoped for, which leaves R. deeply alarmed. The household goes out to town in tense silence, and R. starts considering a journey to sort things out with the Wagneriana, while a spider crawling over Cohn’s letter becomes the evening’s only odd comfort. The day ends in heaviness and quiet strain. |
| January 23, 1872 | 168 | R. concludes that he must make the trip himself, and the mood in the house collapses at the thought of his departure. Heckel cannot leave his business, so the hoped-for substitute disappears and R. settles into drafting plans and assessing the situation. Lenbach writes that another portrait of R. is nearly finished, but the news cannot soften the sense of disruption. The children cry, the household feels emptied out, and an awkward Hamburg admirer adds one more complication to the day. |
| January 24, 1872 | 205 | R. leaves for his journey, and the departure becomes a charged family scene marked by affection and unease. Before going, he plays the last page of the first scene, speaks with unusual tenderness about the work, and insists that the real creative force remains intact. At the station he tries to reassure the narrator, calling himself happy and grateful for the wife he has been given. After he is gone, the evening turns heavy and domestic, with children to manage, letters to answer, and a melancholy return to solitude. |
| January 25, 1872 | 52 | A telegram from R. reports that he is in good spirits, which steadies the day somewhat. The narrator keeps busy with writing, teaching, and walking with the children, trying to think as little as possible about the separation. A sympathetic note from Prof. N. in Basel brings a bit of outside support, and the evening is spent quietly alone upstairs. The whole day has the feeling of careful restraint after an emotional strain. |
| January 26, 1872 | 50 | Fine weather and a reassuring telegram suggest that the difficult matter may yet resolve favorably. The narrator writes to R., walks in the garden, and lets the spring air and sunlight improve her mood. By evening, the moonlight and the day’s beauty deepen into a reflective melancholy rather than simple cheer. The reading of Beethoven adds to the inward, contemplative tone. |
| January 27, 1872 | 64 | With no telegram arriving, anxiety returns under a pale, cold sky. A letter from her father brings news of Hans’s successes in Vienna and Pest, along with the libretto of his Christus, but it does not fully dispel the worry. Later in the day a telegram from R. finally comes, saying he is resting and returning by way of Weimar, Dessau, and Bayreuth after deciding what to do. The evening ends more peacefully, with a satisfied reading of Tasso. |
| January 28, 1872 | 144 | Fog, snow, and frost replace the previous day’s brightness, and the household turns inward. The narrator works on penciled sketches, hears good news from a letter about Hins in Berlin, and takes Fidi into town to buy cakes for an evening gathering with her daughters. Their enjoyment is short-lived because Loldi falls ill, and the festivity has to be cut off. A frightening knocking later in the night leads to alarm, vigilance, and a restless sleep on a mattress in Kathchen’s room. |
| January 29, 1872 | 86 | A telegram from R. says he is leaving Berlin for Weimar, and the relief is that the earlier warning did not concern him personally. Loldi remains seriously unwell, so the narrator spends the day nursing her and keeping close to her side. In the evening R. writes that matters are satisfactory, if not ideal, and that Feustel has unexpectedly become a useful ally. The day closes with letters sent to R., Frau Wesendonck, and Pohl. |
| January 30, 1872 | 132 | Loldi improves a little, allowing the narrator to stay with her in the morning and then make an afternoon trip into town. Despite a small practical errand about dancing lessons, the day is shadowed by a sense of not belonging anywhere. A telegram from R. in Weimar says he is well and will go on to Bayreuth the next day, but the clipped telegraphic style only deepens the irritation. The night brings another strange knocking, reinforcing the unsettled mood. |
| January 31, 1872 | 42 | Loldi is much better, and the day is calmer than the ones before it. A letter arrives from the narrator’s mother, while R. writes a short but comforting note from Berlin and sends caviar from Leipzig. The narrator spends part of the day with Loldi, goes into town in the afternoon, and later reads Nietzsche. The tone is one of recovery, modest domestic routines, and a little intellectual diversion at day’s end. |
| No diary entries found. | ||