Cosima's Diaries
Recordings by Cosima Wagner between 1869 and 1883
Cosima Wagner kept her diaries from 1 January 1869 at Tribschen until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, so that Siegfried would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: Wagner’s talk, his dreams, the evening readings, the music, the visitors, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear him thinking aloud for so long. The diaries follow the Tribschen idyll, the building of the Bayreuth festival theatre and the composition of Parsifal.
The entries are arranged by year and month and each can be opened on its own page. The sections below trace the main lines of the diaries.
Cosima Wagner began her diaries at Tribschen on 1 January 1869 and kept them until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, and above all for Siegfried, so that he would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: what Wagner said at breakfast, his dreams, the evening readings of Shakespeare, Calderón and Goethe, the music played at the piano, the visitors, illnesses, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear Wagner thinking aloud for so long, or shows so clearly how his ideas moved in his last fourteen years. At Tribschen the household lives in a private idyll, sealed by the birth of a son and by marriage, with the Ring resumed and Nietzsche a frequent guest. From 1872 everything turns to Bayreuth and the building of a festival theatre, achieved through years of fundraising and near collapse. After the 1876 Ring the diaries draw inward to Parsifal, written at Wahnfried and finished on long Italian journeys, while Wagner’s talk reaches toward a religion of compassion drawn from Schopenhauer, Buddhism and the Gospels. The same pages record, often and plainly, the antisemitism of both Wagner and Cosima.
Tribschen. The first pages are a confession. Cosima, who had left Hans von Bülow for Wagner, calls her love “a rebirth, a deliverance,” and writes under a constant sense of guilt toward her husband that she never lost. The years at Tribschen bring the birth of Siegfried in June 1869, her divorce and her marriage to Wagner in the Protestant church at Lucerne on 25 August 1870, the Franco-Prussian War, the essay Beethoven and the completion of Siegfried. On her birthday that Christmas she woke to the Siegfried Idyll played on the staircase. Nietzsche first called on 17 May 1869 and became almost one of the family; his manuscript on the birth of tragedy arrived as a Christmas gift in 1870. Wagner’s remarks already circle the themes of his last years. Music, he said in November 1869, “is the direct product of Christianity, as is the saint,” and the next spring he described the Knight of the Grail as free because “he acts, not in his own behalf, but for others.” If anyone asked whether there was a God, he said in 1870, he would answer that at a moment when thousands are singing to him, “God is alive, he is there.”
Founding Bayreuth. In April 1871 the Wagners first saw Bayreuth; its baroque opera house “will not do for us at all; so we must build.” The foundation stone was laid in the rain on 22 May 1872, Wagner’s birthday, followed by the Ninth Symphony in the old opera house. The next four years are full of patrons, Wagner societies, singers, architects, concert tours and money. A royal loan in 1874 rescued the enterprise, and the family moved into Wahnfried that April. On 21 November 1874 Wagner finished the score of Götterdämmerung, a day Cosima remembered with tears, because he was hurt to find her reading a letter from her father at that moment. In between, Cosima converted to Protestantism on 31 October 1872 and took Communion with Wagner: “I felt as if our bond had only now been truly sealed.”
The first festival. The Ring was given complete for the first time in August 1876, before the German Emperor and much of musical Europe. The diaries record the mishaps as well as the triumph, and the exhaustion afterwards: looking back that November, Wagner said his main feeling during the performances had been “Never again, never again!” The festival left a large deficit, and the autumn in Italy brought two meetings that would shape the coming years: the last time the Wagners spent with Nietzsche, at Sorrento, and the first meeting with Count Arthur de Gobineau in Rome on 30 November.
The Parsifal years. Wagner began Parsifal in earnest in 1877 and finished the prose draft on 28 February (“The Redeemer unchained!” Cosima wrote) and the poem on 19 April. Composing the Communion scene that August, he told her that “this scene of Holy Communion will be the main scene, the core of the whole work.” The music grew slowly through 1878 and 1879 beside the founding of the Bayreuther Blätter, the regenerative essays and campaigns against vivisection, and the widening break with Nietzsche. In 1880 the family moved to Naples, where Paul von Joukowsky joined them as stage designer and the garden at Ravello suggested Klingsor’s magic garden; in Siena that August the cathedral moved Wagner to tears and became a model for the Temple of the Grail. That November he conducted the Prelude privately for King Ludwig in Munich. Gobineau stayed at Wahnfried in 1881, and Wagner read his books on race and on the Persians with growing enthusiasm. The score was finished in Palermo on 13 January 1882. “With this, as with all his other works,” Cosima wrote, “he had feared being interrupted by death.”
The premiere and Venice. Sixteen performances of Parsifal followed in July and August 1882, conducted by Hermann Levi. Wagner asked that the audience not call the singers out after the second act, rebuked a chorister for joking about the bread, and at the last performance took the baton himself for the end of the third act. The family then settled in the Palazzo Vendramin in Venice. The last months bring the news of Gobineau’s death, Liszt’s long visit, Hans von Bülow’s breakdown, and on Christmas Eve a performance at La Fenice of the symphony Wagner had written at nineteen, played as a birthday present to Cosima. He was weakened by repeated heart spasms, and he was still talking about writing symphonies and an essay on the feminine. The last entry, on 12 February 1883, ends with him at the piano playing the Rhinedaughters’ lament: “Extraordinary that I saw this so clearly at that time!”
Spirituality. The diaries are themselves partly a religious document. Cosima wrote under a sense of “unatonable guilt” toward Bülow and turned it into a discipline of renunciation. After her conversion she took Communion regularly, writing in 1873 that “the only true communion with people is before the altar,” and she read Meister Eckhart, Tauler, the Theologia Germanica and the Imitation of Christ (“Non sum! How dearly I should like to make that my motto!”). Her devotion to Wagner took the same form, and she wrote that in him she found “not my happiness, but my salvation.”
Wagner’s own faith was heterodox and he said so. Its foundation was Schopenhauer: “it was Schopenhauer who revealed Christianity to me,” he told Cosima in 1879. Through Schopenhauer came Buddhism and the Vedanta, which run through the diaries from first to last: the Buddhist drama Die Sieger, often planned and never written; the Brahmin saying “tat tvam asi,” which he spoke to Cosima at Christmas 1874; readings of the Bhagavad-Gita, the Upanishads and, in Venice, a new life of the Buddha. He set the two traditions side by side rather than choosing between them. Brahmanism was “the religion of intelligence,” but Christianity stood above it as “the religion of suffering.” Buddhism was “a flowering of the human spirit” with no church and no compulsion, and by studying the Buddha, he said in 1882, “one learns to understand Christianity.” Cosima put the difference in a sentence of her own: “Buddha does not move one, he teaches; Christ teaches by moving.”
At the centre stood Christ, kept apart from the church. “I do not believe in God, but in godliness, which is revealed in a Jesus without sin,” Wagner said in 1879, and he repeatedly complained that people “think only of the church and confuse this with Christianity.” In his last years he said that he recognized “no religion except compassion,” extended to animals as well as people, and this lay behind his vegetarian leanings and his fury at vivisection. Art was to carry what the churches had lost. “Art makes religions eternal,” he said in 1872; music was “the only possible church nowadays”; and in 1879 he gave the core of Religion and Art in a sentence, that religion should “influence ethics, and allow faith to be represented by art, which can transform illusion into truth.” “The path from religion to art bad, from art to religion good,” he noted in 1880.
Parsifal was where these ideas met, and the diaries show how carefully he guarded its tone. He called it “his most propitiatory work” and spoke of it as the dream vision of a rite, not the rite itself. He kept Christ off the stage on principle: “One cannot paint Christ, but one can portray him in music,” and to have Christ sung by a tenor was “a disgusting idea.” What he hoped for from his audience was less instruction than inward change, a recognition of suffering that leads to compassion and resignation. In December 1882 he said he would never again try to explain his ideas on the blood of Christ: “these are things one all of a sudden grasps.” Six weeks later, talking of Nature’s cruelty, he said it went on “until the appearance of the Saviour on the cross,” and added, “in the urge to put an end to the whole of Nature’s will to live.”
Nietzsche. The diaries hold the whole arc of the friendship. Nietzsche arrives in 1869 as a brilliant young professor who “knows R.’s works thoroughly,” spends holidays at Tribschen, writes The Birth of Tragedy under Wagner’s spell and stands beside him at the foundation stone. Cosima noticed early “a dubious streak” in him. The last meetings were at Sorrento in 1876. When Human, All Too Human arrived in April 1878, Wagner resolved not to read it, and by 1879 Cosima wrote that Nietzsche had “committed the one sin which cannot be atoned for, the sin against the Holy Ghost.” In later years Wagner spoke of him with contempt and some sorrow, as a promising mind that the modern world had ruined, while Cosima admitted that she could still remember only his friendly side.
Antisemitism. Hostile remarks about Jews by both Wagner and Cosima recur from the first year to the last, aimed at the press, critics, money, Meyerbeer and the modern theatre. In 1873 Wagner opposed intermarriage in racial terms, and the remarks grow harsher from 1879, when the antisemitic movement gathered in Berlin. That October, reading a speech by Adolf Stoecker, he was “in favor of expelling them entirely.” In December 1881, after the Ringtheater fire in Vienna, Cosima records him making “a drastic joke to the effect that all Jews should be burned at a performance of Nathan der Weise.” From 1881 Gobineau’s racial theories enter the conversation, though Wagner usually set Christianity against them; in June 1881 he was “downright explosive in favor of Christian theories in contrast to racial ones,” and that December he said that races were “done for, and all that can now make an impact is, as I have ventured to express it, the blood of Christ.” He also refused to sign the 1880 petition to Bismarck against the Jews, declined to let the Bayreuther Blätter join the agitation, and complained that nobody had noticed what Know Thyself said about “our own blame for our situation.”
The same diaries show Wagner depending on Jewish colleagues, above all Joseph Rubinstein, Angelo Neumann and Hermann Levi, and they show how that dependence was poisoned. In 1880 Wagner said he could not let Levi conduct Parsifal “unbaptized,” and in 1881 he told him he hoped to find “a formula which will make you feel completely one of us.” When an anonymous letter that summer made Levi ask to be released, Wagner wrote persuading him to return, and Levi conducted every performance in 1882 and was with the family in Venice in February 1883. One of the last entries records Wagner saying that “the Jews, the good ones,” were “condemned to a gently resigned asceticism.”
Because the diaries run to thousands of entries, the table below is a finding aid rather than a summary. Choose a year and month to browse, or search the entries, then open a day to read it in full.
| Date | Word Count | Subject |
|---|---|---|
| March 1, 1869 | 218 | Snow and gray water return winter to Tribschen, but Richard works steadily and jokes that Cosima will deserve an order if he completes the Nibelungen. The previous day's anger is explained as the pain of having music made with and for her interrupted and misunderstood. Cosima recognizes the difficulty of combining child-rearing with artistic life, yet resolves to master it and face coming trials calmly if her children's hearts remain with her. |
| March 2, 1869 | 420 | Richard tells Cosima their conflicts arise from excessive love and dependence, then works on Wotan's awakening of the Wala while she divides herself between child-rearing and inking the score. A violent foehn strands market people near the lake, and piano duets bring the couple laughter and release. The Tempest, Antony and Cleopatra, Marbach's adaptation, and talk of Shakespeare's life carry the evening from moral awe to comic relief, before a tasteless letter from Mathilde intrudes. |
| March 3, 1869 | 239 | Music from Die Meistersinger returns Richard and Cosima to the period when Eva was in the womb, while Eva herself is startled by Richard's altered costume. Richard reproaches Cosima for staying away out of fear of disturbing him, and the day brightens with piano duets, snow, sunshine, and Viardot's gift of Don Quixote. Dictation resumes, and Richard frames love, genius, and sainthood as three forces through which the species continues, knows itself, and negates the world. |
| March 4, 1869 | 498 | A sunlit snow landscape surrounds Richard's new sketches and his declaration that Cosima's love differs from tragic lovers because she can follow him even artistically. Their discussion of Shakespearean tragedy, artistic form, French unities, and the realism of Shakespeare's world deepens Cosima's sense that Richard instructs and uplifts her. Yet his thoughts on women leave her melancholy and unworthy in her own eyes, despite joy in the children and the evening's dictation. |
| March 5, 1869 | 306 | A dream of public scandal reflects Cosima's fears that her devotion to Richard will be misunderstood by family, aristocratic acquaintances, and posterity. Snow, the arrival of the Jewish pamphlet, and a letter from Hermine bring both solitude and renewed longing for the Munich children, especially the coughing Lusch. Catalogues, dictation, and discussion of a possible one-month visit from the children close a day centered on the need to be known by them. |
| March 6, 1869 | 260 | The children's health and playfulness delight the household, and good news that Kos may return at Easter adds to the morning's happiness. The mood is shattered when Eva faints and Richard returns depressed from a court dispute, disgusted by lawyers, evasions, and the justice system. Cosima sits anxiously by Eva's bed while distant laughter reminds her, without bitterness, that others can still be carefree amid her suffering. |
| March 7, 1869 | 62 | Richard remains disturbed by the court session but continues working, while Cosima spends Sunday with the children and finds relief in Eva's recovery. A walk with Richard and Loldi briefly steadies the day. Cosima's own health collapses into exhaustion, and Schopenhauer's ethics does not answer the anxious question of whether she will regain the children. |
| March 8, 1869 | 121 | Proof corrections for the Devrient article prevent Richard from working on his sketches and make the day dismal. Cosima inks the score in the nursery, worries over Eva's temper, returns to Winckelmann, and waits in suspense for news about seeing the children at Easter. A good letter from Dufflipp brings practical relief through an advance, security for Schott, and help for Beethoven's nephew. |
| March 9, 1869 | 145 | Author's copies of the Jewish pamphlet and a gift gallery of famous Germans arrive while Richard works and the weather turns fine. Cosima walks with Loldi, whose bedtime declaration of affection reassures her, and Richard reads Love's Labour's Lost instead of dictating. His concern for Cosima's condition and her own nocturnal worry about the children's fate give the quiet day an anxious undertone. |
| March 10, 1869 | 278 | Hans thanks Richard for the Jewish pamphlet and reports lucrative performances in Vienna, while the King commands Tristan and Rheingold for later in the year. Richard tells Cosima that daily conversation with her alone would make him fortunate, yet his work leaves him dangerously exhausted. A drive with Loldi, thoughts on family temperament, Shakespeare, and a midnight awakening fix Cosima's sense that her sole task is to ease Richard's life while trusting one child may one day help the others. |
| March 11, 1869 | 202 | Kos's recovery brings joy, but Berlioz's death prompts Cosima and Richard to contemplate the year's terrible harvest of losses. Letters, Paris reports, Mathilde's account of Meistersinger in Mannheim, and the looming Vatican Council move through a day of spring air and despondency. Cosima frames suffering as the highest good and ends quietly because Richard is tired. |
| March 12, 1869 | 459 | Cosima wakes in deep melancholy and tries to restrain thought as her heart feels stretched by accumulated troubles. Richard greets her with music inspired by imagining her with the children, while a recent encounter forces him to acknowledge publicly that she is at Tribschen. Bad weather, Winckelmann, childcare, Wagner's thoughts on music from Bach to Beethoven, doubts about his own composition, Edda readings, and the power of his voice fill the rest of the day. |
| March 13, 1869 | 415 | A mocking press phrase and criticism of the Jewish pamphlet amuse and irritate Richard, while practical concerns lead the couple to decide on hiring an outside nurse. Cosima still lacks word on whether the children will come, and Richard reads Simrock's Germanic poetry in the evening. The original row then shifts to a beggar from the papal army, renewed snow, Richard's worry for Cosima, children's dancing, Lessing's Minna von Barnhelm, and her vow to bear suffering loyally for him. |
| March 15, 1869 | 353 | After late reading leaves Richard ill, Pasdeloup's long visit over Rienzi becomes a test of endurance that makes Cosima suffer with him helplessly. Her successful Judith Mendes letter is praised, while an anonymous threatening letter from Breslau intensifies her sense of being dragged into public hatred. Anecdotes from Parisian performances mingle with her deepest wishes: to remain beside Richard, share his death, and find happiness only in his joy. |
| March 16, 1869 | 140 | Richard's good sleep feels to Cosima like reunion, and the morning turns to Mme Viardot's response to the Jewish pamphlet. Cosima drafts lines for Richard to send, writes to Loulou and Mathilde, walks with Loldi, and worries over a too-fine gold pen nib ordered from New York. The day is quiet but emotionally charged by fatigue, correspondence, and thoughts of the children. |
| March 17, 1869 | 134 | A forwarded letter from the King fills Cosima with misery through its ecstatic tone, while another Viardot letter asks for musical explanation and seems to retreat from the previous day's response. She embroiders with the children, Richard sketches, and their lunch conversation dwells on loyal Loulou and the Munich children beneath the black cloud around her heart. Newspapers rage over the Jewish pamphlet, and evening dictation restores order. |
| March 18, 1869 | 98 | Richard is unwell and unable to work, while Vreneli goes to Zurich to bring Kos home. A friendly anonymous letter about the Jewish pamphlet and Richter's search for singers for Tristan, Rheingold, and Walküre show Wagner's public activity gathering force. Cosima, still without news of the children, asks Richard to write Hans and fills the spring day with embroidery, score work, and garden time. |
| March 19, 1869 | 400 | Kos returns changed, Richard works, and Cosima embroiders with the children while mail brings honors, press falsehoods, and new grievances over Semper's claims. Still without news of the children, she thinks back to Boni's birth six years earlier, recalling loneliness, neglect, and Richard's distant concern as the contrast that explains her later destiny. The memory is written not as accusation but as evidence of the emptiness from which Richard's love delivered her. |
| March 20, 1869 | 108 | An abusive Breslau letter and an ugly drawing from the King arrive as snow renews the contest between winter and spring. Cosima worries over a troubling expression in Loldi's eyes and remains suspended without word about whether she will see the children. Evening dictation follows inspection of Odysseus's house plan, giving the day a scholarly close despite inner uncertainty. |
| March 21, 1869 | 169 | Still without news from the children, Cosima hears Richard reflect that their love could never have fit ordinary rules. Sunday passes through work, embroidery, play, Otfried Muller's Dorians, and a long sleep born of worry. A twilight bird briefly awakens hope before a rook silences it, while Richard writes to the King and jokes about wanting to lead her into a wilderness that no longer exists. |
| March 22, 1869 | 169 | A Monday of mishaps begins when a chimneysweep disrupts Richard's early plans, and his letter to the King leaves Cosima melancholy about the form of his royal address. Hans sends a favorable Catholic article on the Jewish pamphlet, but the day remains gloomy with childcare, embroidery, and inking the score. At night Cosima ponders love, sexuality, and purity, concluding that no love could be deeper or truer than hers for Richard. |
| March 23, 1869 | 167 | The first days of spring are dismal, and Cosima steels herself with the belief that suffering must be borne silently and courageously. Richard's account of friendly greetings from chained convicts leads him to reflect on legality, punishment, and public redress. The day is sparse but disciplined, with afternoon inking and evening dictation. |
| March 24, 1869 | 200 | Cosima cannot stop her tears as the mail again brings no assurance that she will see the children at Easter. Richard plays powerful Siegfried music, but lunch is interrupted when Loldi becomes ill, apparently from drinking from a brandy flask, and the doctor also reports local interest in the Jewish pamphlet. Discussion of Cosima's position leaves her resigned that only the King publicly joins her and Richard, while the loss of the Easter visit must simply be borne. |
| March 25, 1869 | 435 | On Maundy Thursday, Richard laments Cosima's care in his household before they make a cheerful outing to town with the children and find letters that leave the Easter visit undecided. The original row then moves into Good Friday letters, arrival of Devrient pamphlets and Schubert songs, and Cosima's church wish for the children's wellbeing, forgiveness, and mercy toward all involved in her pain. Sunshine, Schubert, news of agitation over the Jewish pamphlet, and Plato's Ion and Hippias make the evening solemn and beautiful. |
| March 27, 1869 | 112 | Richard's correction appears in the Signale, followed by a sentimental Jewish admirer whose protest against Judaism in Music renews discussion of the pamphlet. Cosima's strained eyes, Breslau attacks, Plato, and the children fill the day, and Richard is touched to find her showing the children Ring pictures. His happiness in their domestic scene becomes the day's emotional center before Hippias Minor in the evening. |
| March 28, 1869 | 370 | Richard marvels that Cosima has spent a whole winter with him and names their love a truth amid worldly deception. Hans reports mounting reactions to the Jewish pamphlet, including Jewish hostility in Munich and pressure against Lohengrin in Breslau, while Cosima worries about intrigues against Hans. Egg-hunting, snow, Schubert songs, a letter to Meysenbug, and Richard's image of their happiness surrounded by wolves close the day. |
| March 29, 1869 | 316 | Cosima is startled by her aging appearance and tends to children with minor ailments while Richard works. A conversation about religious conversion and marriage exposes the different sacrifices expected of women and men, leaving her serious and unsettled. Colonel Am Rhyn's visit and an evening with Alcibiades II complete a day of inward adjustment to the asymmetry of love. |
| March 30, 1869 | 290 | Heavy snow, weak eyes, and silence from Munich are offset by praise for the Jewish pamphlet and comic reports of accusations against Richard's motives. A walk into town brings a longed-for letter from Hermine promising that Cosima will see the children in a week. The joy is contained because Richard is unwell, and the day is seared by his near-miraculous rescue of Kos from an oncoming train. |
| March 31, 1869 | 121 | Spring warmth lets Cosima embroider in the garden while the children dance and play, but plans to redecorate the rooms make her sad because her mind is fixed on the children. Richard reports that Siegfried is rushing through the flames, yet Loulou's formal letter and Mathilde's overwise one trouble the household. Plato's Lysis gives intense pleasure, while practical concern turns to finding a nurse. |
| No diary entries found. | ||