Thursday, March 25:
Maundy Thursday.
In the morning R. laments bitterly that I am so badly looked after in his house; I am sorry that he takes so to heart something which has always seemed to me so trivial. He works a little, I embroider and play with the children.
After lunch he suggests that I walk into town with him, and is pleasantly surprised when I agree. So to town with the two children, in gay mood. Stopped for a rest in a hotel, drank coffee and ate cakes, also glanced through newspapers.
Then at the post office found a letter from Hermine. It is still undecided whether the children will come, Hans’s usual irresolution! Claire writes to me, too, and reports that my mother is again very unwell, a condition calling for profound pity.
Passed the evening conversing with R. He is happy, because I have had a letter.
Good Friday, March 26:
Wrote to Hermine and to Claire. The former tells me, among other things, that Hans intends to give up the little apartment, so R. can send for his things.
Around midday the sun comes out, which makes me very glad. My mood is quietly melancholy; how I should welcome the assurance that all are happy and well!
Just before noon the pamphlets arrive, Herr Eduard Devrient and His Style, and the complete songs of Schubert.
Then I go to church, if only in order not to offend those people who cannot understand that such a day is better spent silently at home. It was three o’clock when I entered the Barfüsser church with Loldi; at this hour, I was told as a child, one may make a wish and it will be granted.
So I wished for happiness and good health for the children and all who have come in close touch with me, and for the forgiveness of all to whom I have brought pain; in my spirit I then pardoned all who have either done me harm or wished me harm or are preparing to do so.
R. comes to fetch me and we return home together. Lovely sunshine, clear air, birds twittering in the branches.
How firmly I am resolved to suppress everything, to bear every worry by myself and to seek salvation in every act of suffering and self-sacrifice! Thus I participate in this sacred day and hope for my dear ones.
At home R. played and sang to me from the Schubert volumes.
The Signale has not accepted his denial of the false report; on the other hand Dr. Lang writes that the Jewish population is seething in Berlin.
Spent a wonderful evening with two of Plato’s dialogues, Ion and Hippias.