Cosima's Diaries
Recordings by Cosima Wagner between 1869 and 1883
Cosima Wagner kept her diaries from 1 January 1869 at Tribschen until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, so that Siegfried would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: Wagner’s talk, his dreams, the evening readings, the music, the visitors, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear him thinking aloud for so long. The diaries follow the Tribschen idyll, the building of the Bayreuth festival theatre and the composition of Parsifal.
The entries are arranged by year and month and each can be opened on its own page. The sections below trace the main lines of the diaries.
Cosima Wagner began her diaries at Tribschen on 1 January 1869 and kept them until the night before Wagner’s death in Venice on 13 February 1883. She wrote them for her children, and above all for Siegfried, so that he would one day know his father “truly,” and she wrote nearly every day: what Wagner said at breakfast, his dreams, the evening readings of Shakespeare, Calderón and Goethe, the music played at the piano, the visitors, illnesses, debts and quarrels. No other source lets us hear Wagner thinking aloud for so long, or shows so clearly how his ideas moved in his last fourteen years. At Tribschen the household lives in a private idyll, sealed by the birth of a son and by marriage, with the Ring resumed and Nietzsche a frequent guest. From 1872 everything turns to Bayreuth and the building of a festival theatre, achieved through years of fundraising and near collapse. After the 1876 Ring the diaries draw inward to Parsifal, written at Wahnfried and finished on long Italian journeys, while Wagner’s talk reaches toward a religion of compassion drawn from Schopenhauer, Buddhism and the Gospels. The same pages record, often and plainly, the antisemitism of both Wagner and Cosima.
Tribschen. The first pages are a confession. Cosima, who had left Hans von Bülow for Wagner, calls her love “a rebirth, a deliverance,” and writes under a constant sense of guilt toward her husband that she never lost. The years at Tribschen bring the birth of Siegfried in June 1869, her divorce and her marriage to Wagner in the Protestant church at Lucerne on 25 August 1870, the Franco-Prussian War, the essay Beethoven and the completion of Siegfried. On her birthday that Christmas she woke to the Siegfried Idyll played on the staircase. Nietzsche first called on 17 May 1869 and became almost one of the family; his manuscript on the birth of tragedy arrived as a Christmas gift in 1870. Wagner’s remarks already circle the themes of his last years. Music, he said in November 1869, “is the direct product of Christianity, as is the saint,” and the next spring he described the Knight of the Grail as free because “he acts, not in his own behalf, but for others.” If anyone asked whether there was a God, he said in 1870, he would answer that at a moment when thousands are singing to him, “God is alive, he is there.”
Founding Bayreuth. In April 1871 the Wagners first saw Bayreuth; its baroque opera house “will not do for us at all; so we must build.” The foundation stone was laid in the rain on 22 May 1872, Wagner’s birthday, followed by the Ninth Symphony in the old opera house. The next four years are full of patrons, Wagner societies, singers, architects, concert tours and money. A royal loan in 1874 rescued the enterprise, and the family moved into Wahnfried that April. On 21 November 1874 Wagner finished the score of Götterdämmerung, a day Cosima remembered with tears, because he was hurt to find her reading a letter from her father at that moment. In between, Cosima converted to Protestantism on 31 October 1872 and took Communion with Wagner: “I felt as if our bond had only now been truly sealed.”
The first festival. The Ring was given complete for the first time in August 1876, before the German Emperor and much of musical Europe. The diaries record the mishaps as well as the triumph, and the exhaustion afterwards: looking back that November, Wagner said his main feeling during the performances had been “Never again, never again!” The festival left a large deficit, and the autumn in Italy brought two meetings that would shape the coming years: the last time the Wagners spent with Nietzsche, at Sorrento, and the first meeting with Count Arthur de Gobineau in Rome on 30 November.
The Parsifal years. Wagner began Parsifal in earnest in 1877 and finished the prose draft on 28 February (“The Redeemer unchained!” Cosima wrote) and the poem on 19 April. Composing the Communion scene that August, he told her that “this scene of Holy Communion will be the main scene, the core of the whole work.” The music grew slowly through 1878 and 1879 beside the founding of the Bayreuther Blätter, the regenerative essays and campaigns against vivisection, and the widening break with Nietzsche. In 1880 the family moved to Naples, where Paul von Joukowsky joined them as stage designer and the garden at Ravello suggested Klingsor’s magic garden; in Siena that August the cathedral moved Wagner to tears and became a model for the Temple of the Grail. That November he conducted the Prelude privately for King Ludwig in Munich. Gobineau stayed at Wahnfried in 1881, and Wagner read his books on race and on the Persians with growing enthusiasm. The score was finished in Palermo on 13 January 1882. “With this, as with all his other works,” Cosima wrote, “he had feared being interrupted by death.”
The premiere and Venice. Sixteen performances of Parsifal followed in July and August 1882, conducted by Hermann Levi. Wagner asked that the audience not call the singers out after the second act, rebuked a chorister for joking about the bread, and at the last performance took the baton himself for the end of the third act. The family then settled in the Palazzo Vendramin in Venice. The last months bring the news of Gobineau’s death, Liszt’s long visit, Hans von Bülow’s breakdown, and on Christmas Eve a performance at La Fenice of the symphony Wagner had written at nineteen, played as a birthday present to Cosima. He was weakened by repeated heart spasms, and he was still talking about writing symphonies and an essay on the feminine. The last entry, on 12 February 1883, ends with him at the piano playing the Rhinedaughters’ lament: “Extraordinary that I saw this so clearly at that time!”
Spirituality. The diaries are themselves partly a religious document. Cosima wrote under a sense of “unatonable guilt” toward Bülow and turned it into a discipline of renunciation. After her conversion she took Communion regularly, writing in 1873 that “the only true communion with people is before the altar,” and she read Meister Eckhart, Tauler, the Theologia Germanica and the Imitation of Christ (“Non sum! How dearly I should like to make that my motto!”). Her devotion to Wagner took the same form, and she wrote that in him she found “not my happiness, but my salvation.”
Wagner’s own faith was heterodox and he said so. Its foundation was Schopenhauer: “it was Schopenhauer who revealed Christianity to me,” he told Cosima in 1879. Through Schopenhauer came Buddhism and the Vedanta, which run through the diaries from first to last: the Buddhist drama Die Sieger, often planned and never written; the Brahmin saying “tat tvam asi,” which he spoke to Cosima at Christmas 1874; readings of the Bhagavad-Gita, the Upanishads and, in Venice, a new life of the Buddha. He set the two traditions side by side rather than choosing between them. Brahmanism was “the religion of intelligence,” but Christianity stood above it as “the religion of suffering.” Buddhism was “a flowering of the human spirit” with no church and no compulsion, and by studying the Buddha, he said in 1882, “one learns to understand Christianity.” Cosima put the difference in a sentence of her own: “Buddha does not move one, he teaches; Christ teaches by moving.”
At the centre stood Christ, kept apart from the church. “I do not believe in God, but in godliness, which is revealed in a Jesus without sin,” Wagner said in 1879, and he repeatedly complained that people “think only of the church and confuse this with Christianity.” In his last years he said that he recognized “no religion except compassion,” extended to animals as well as people, and this lay behind his vegetarian leanings and his fury at vivisection. Art was to carry what the churches had lost. “Art makes religions eternal,” he said in 1872; music was “the only possible church nowadays”; and in 1879 he gave the core of Religion and Art in a sentence, that religion should “influence ethics, and allow faith to be represented by art, which can transform illusion into truth.” “The path from religion to art bad, from art to religion good,” he noted in 1880.
Parsifal was where these ideas met, and the diaries show how carefully he guarded its tone. He called it “his most propitiatory work” and spoke of it as the dream vision of a rite, not the rite itself. He kept Christ off the stage on principle: “One cannot paint Christ, but one can portray him in music,” and to have Christ sung by a tenor was “a disgusting idea.” What he hoped for from his audience was less instruction than inward change, a recognition of suffering that leads to compassion and resignation. In December 1882 he said he would never again try to explain his ideas on the blood of Christ: “these are things one all of a sudden grasps.” Six weeks later, talking of Nature’s cruelty, he said it went on “until the appearance of the Saviour on the cross,” and added, “in the urge to put an end to the whole of Nature’s will to live.”
Nietzsche. The diaries hold the whole arc of the friendship. Nietzsche arrives in 1869 as a brilliant young professor who “knows R.’s works thoroughly,” spends holidays at Tribschen, writes The Birth of Tragedy under Wagner’s spell and stands beside him at the foundation stone. Cosima noticed early “a dubious streak” in him. The last meetings were at Sorrento in 1876. When Human, All Too Human arrived in April 1878, Wagner resolved not to read it, and by 1879 Cosima wrote that Nietzsche had “committed the one sin which cannot be atoned for, the sin against the Holy Ghost.” In later years Wagner spoke of him with contempt and some sorrow, as a promising mind that the modern world had ruined, while Cosima admitted that she could still remember only his friendly side.
Antisemitism. Hostile remarks about Jews by both Wagner and Cosima recur from the first year to the last, aimed at the press, critics, money, Meyerbeer and the modern theatre. In 1873 Wagner opposed intermarriage in racial terms, and the remarks grow harsher from 1879, when the antisemitic movement gathered in Berlin. That October, reading a speech by Adolf Stoecker, he was “in favor of expelling them entirely.” In December 1881, after the Ringtheater fire in Vienna, Cosima records him making “a drastic joke to the effect that all Jews should be burned at a performance of Nathan der Weise.” From 1881 Gobineau’s racial theories enter the conversation, though Wagner usually set Christianity against them; in June 1881 he was “downright explosive in favor of Christian theories in contrast to racial ones,” and that December he said that races were “done for, and all that can now make an impact is, as I have ventured to express it, the blood of Christ.” He also refused to sign the 1880 petition to Bismarck against the Jews, declined to let the Bayreuther Blätter join the agitation, and complained that nobody had noticed what Know Thyself said about “our own blame for our situation.”
The same diaries show Wagner depending on Jewish colleagues, above all Joseph Rubinstein, Angelo Neumann and Hermann Levi, and they show how that dependence was poisoned. In 1880 Wagner said he could not let Levi conduct Parsifal “unbaptized,” and in 1881 he told him he hoped to find “a formula which will make you feel completely one of us.” When an anonymous letter that summer made Levi ask to be released, Wagner wrote persuading him to return, and Levi conducted every performance in 1882 and was with the family in Venice in February 1883. One of the last entries records Wagner saying that “the Jews, the good ones,” were “condemned to a gently resigned asceticism.”
Because the diaries run to thousands of entries, the table below is a finding aid rather than a summary. Choose a year and month to browse, or search the entries, then open a day to read it in full.
| Date | Word Count | Subject |
|---|---|---|
| May 1, 1873 | 68 | The day combines creative labor, domestic planning, and anxiety about an upcoming performance. Fine weather briefly lifts the mood, and the new house becomes a site of quiet happiness in the presence of birds, trees, and a nesting stork. Conversation later moves to Greek politics and order, broadening the entry from family life to cultural thought. |
| May 2, 1873 | 98 | The morning begins playfully and affectionately, but quickly shifts into talk of business, public reception, and wounded feelings. R. remarks bitterly on the impossible conditions of his artistic life, yet the entry also shows his need for tenderness and mutual understanding. The middle and end of the day expand into memory, civic praise, charitable initiative, and harsh reactions to a misinterpreted performance. |
| May 3, 1873 | 576 | Poor health and gloomy weather mark the start, delaying work and turning attention to family recreation. A walk through the landscape leads to reflections on declining strength, mortality, and the possibility of eventual triumph after struggle. The writer remains loyal but inwardly uncertain, holding back her own doubts so as not to weaken his resolve. |
| May 4, 1873 | 227 | The day closes the sequence with a more contemplative atmosphere, focused on reading and reflection rather than action. The emotional center remains R.'s sense of his own unfinished life and his dependence on future vindication. Beneath that lies the writer's quiet endurance, accepting uncertainty while preserving hope for the cause they share. |
| May 5, 1873 | 615 | The day was marked by frustration and strain around preparations for a birthday surprise, with little real help from others. Amid practical worries, the speaker and R. moved into broader reflections on Greek tragedy, ancient performance, and the unfamiliar force of classical speech. Later concerns about Bayreuth and palace-garden access mixed with political gossip, customs policy, and letters from family, ending in further annoyance over performance plans and timing. |
| May 6, 1873 | 399 | The morning brought ordinary errands and a discouraging report about the house, but the deeper blow came when a friend’s letter announced the death of his eldest son. That grief set the emotional tone for the day, even as the couple tried to keep going and found brief relief in laughter over Don Quixote. Evening conversations about optimism, the theater, and public life closed with a more cheerful mood, though it had to be forced through sorrow. |
| May 7, 1873 | 93 | The day unfolded with lingering setbacks and a sense that luck was absent. Work continued on music and correspondence, while a visit to the new house and an evening with Grimm’s German Language offered some intellectual pleasure. The entry ends in a reflection on myth, history, and the disputed goodness of people, suggesting a mind balancing scholarship with skepticism. |
| May 8, 1873 | 162 | Practical anxieties dominated the day, from refusing a new commission for an opera to worrying over family health and theatrical arrangements. The evening brought a surge of relief when confirmation arrived that the theater music was secured, turning tension into gratitude. Even so, the account closes with more political irony about palace-garden intrigue and courtly maneuvering in Bavaria. |
| May 9, 1873 | 226 | This entry is inward and burdened, centered on concern for the children and fear of criticism over their upbringing. The writer debates whether to surrender responsibility to schooling or continue in a role that seems to bring little recognition and much anxiety. Additional troubles with R.’s organization and the birthday arrangements deepen the sense of strain, though the King’s inquiry about a birthday gift offers a small opening for favor. |
| May 10, 1873 | 165 | The day combined domestic care with public duties and a generally disheartening view of the people involved in the tableaux vivants. The speaker had to assess performers while dealing with vanity, weakness, and her own unease about the whole undertaking. In the evening there was some intellectual relief through reading, but the atmosphere remained marked by concern and by R.’s dry remark that Richter needs distraction. |
| May 11, 1873 | 396 | The entry is charged with dream imagery, emotional unrest, and repeated disappointments in practical matters. R. meditates darkly on suicide, resignation, and the failings of civilization, while also expressing a volcanic sense of inner force and distrust. Political admiration, publisher troubles, illness, and ongoing rescue plans all crowd in, leaving the day heavy yet intellectually vivid. |
| May 12, 1873 | 186 | Physical illness and mounting fear dominate this day. R. shows troubling symptoms, including weakness and memory lapses, while Daniella is also seriously unwell, and the speaker is overwhelmed by worry despite the doctor’s reassurance. Alongside this, R. remains engaged with reading and orchestration, but the larger impression is of a household under threat. |
| May 13, 1873 | 89 | The speaker spends the day confined and unwell, while R. still manages his orchestration and legal errands. There is warmth in the presence of Fidi and some private delight in preparing a poem and noticing hidden meanings everywhere. Yet the entry remains shadowed by Daniella’s illness and by the persistent pressure of R.’s declining condition. |
| May 14, 1873 | 133 | R. is too unwell to work, so the speaker takes over correspondence and quietly manages obligations on his behalf. Much of the day is shaped by secrecy, as she rearranges meetings to slip away to a rehearsal and tries to preserve a small surprise for him. The evening confirms that the plan will succeed, even as a broader financial crisis and talk of bankruptcy underscore how unstable the wider world feels. |
| May 15, 1873 | 292 | The day unfolds around a mixture of domestic satisfaction, literary amusement, and political irritation. A dream and a real financial gift seem to mirror one another, reinforcing a sense of providential good fortune. Yet the pleasure of the new house and family is shadowed by outrage at a Berlin publisher’s maneuvering over Tannhäuser. The evening turns to reading serious essays that place Wagner’s circle amid larger cultural debates. |
| May 16, 1873 | 314 | The morning is dominated by letters and grievances, with Wagner immediately responding to a publishing slight. The household is lively with the children, and Wagner reflects sentimentally on his son’s future while also comparing his own past disappointments. A rehearsal and a reviewer’s criticism drain the day of energy, making even ordinary artistic work feel embattled. By evening, the couple returns to reading, but the subject matter is treated as both interesting and distasteful. |
| May 17, 1873 | 238 | Wagner continues to enjoy scholarly arguments that support his own theories, and he turns even a small philological point into an occasion for confidence. He also gives strategic advice to a correspondent in Berlin, though this creates tension because of his wife’s unease. A misunderstanding between them deepens into sorrow, revealing how easily practical missteps become emotional wounds. The day closes with discussion of a dense philosophical text, where thought and domestic feeling remain tightly intertwined. |
| May 18, 1873 | 508 | The day begins with Wagner apologetic and self-doubting, as if yesterday’s friction has shaken his sense of worth. A mayoral visit and discussion of press pieces lead him into broader reflections on finance, the state, and national character. A storm, music, and household noise frame a series of remarks about language, history, and the need for a home. The evening ends with admiration for Shakespeare’s artistry and renewed anxiety over an approaching journey and rehearsals. |
| May 20, 1873 | 82 | Physical discomfort and practical disorder dominate the day, from illness in the household to sleep loss and logistical problems. Visitors arrive, plans for orchestral arrangements prove difficult, and the amateur organizers are unsettled by ambitious suggestions. The evening is spent in reading, suggesting that intellectual routine continues despite the strain. Overall the day feels consumed by friction between artistic aspirations and ordinary constraints. |
| May 21, 1873 | 100 | The morning begins with severe illness, keeping the narrator in bed while preparations continue without her. A stream of visiting musicians and friends arrives, creating a crowded and ceremonial atmosphere. Rehearsal problems persist, especially in the final tableau, which must be reorganized before it works better. Wagner returns late and irritated, leaving the day marked by both social bustle and artistic dissatisfaction. |
| May 22, 1873 | 455 | The early morning is devoted to a carefully staged musical surprise, with the street already crowded before the official performance begins. Wagner is kept unsuspecting until the birthday celebration unfolds, culminating in emotional toasts and tears from the whole family. The children contribute poems, books, and gifts, while a new poodle adds a domestic flourish to the occasion. The evening’s revelations end in gratitude, astonishment, and a sense that the day’s secrecy succeeded perfectly. |
| May 23, 1873 | 261 | The day is shadowed by a troubling dream and by the narrator’s deeper unease about her role in moments of celebration. She describes a recurring melancholy rooted in the feeling that personal joy is somehow illegitimate or intrusive. Despite this, the household hosts lunch and an evening gathering with music, and the performances seem to reveal Wagner’s life in a new light. Her final reflection is less about the festivities themselves than about the wish for his peace and the wish to disappear from her own self-consciousness. |
| May 24, 1873 | 66 | Wagner sleeps well but is preoccupied by the interruption to his work caused by travel. The afternoon and evening are spent with visitors and practical matters, including discussions of decorative materials, which make the day feel somewhat tiresome. Amid this, the narrator is pleased by the children’s composure at the recent festivities. The tone is one of fatigue after celebration, with family behavior providing the day’s main consolation. |
| May 25, 1873 | 163 | The day turns toward gratitude and administrative aftermath, as the narrator writes many letters and tries to resist a mood of discouragement. Reports confirm that the celebrations were widely appreciated by the town, and the communal character of the event is emphasized. A sculptor arrives to discuss a bust of Wagner, leading to admiration for the house’s inward-built design. In the evening, reading aloud from Wagner’s biography unexpectedly produces discomfort, suggesting that commemorating the self can be as unsettling as celebrating it. |
| May 26, 1873 | 88 | The day is marked by hesitation over travel and by domestic uncertainty rather than firm decision. A letter from Weber and stale printing errors in the new edition add irritation to the mood. News from Paris is received with unusual indifference, suggesting how larger political events have become flattened by recent upheavals. The entry closes in a spirit of suspended plans and muted discontent. |
| May 27, 1873 | 89 | The central tension is whether to go to Weimar for the performance of Christus, and no one can quite settle the matter. The decision swings back and forth through visits, lunch, and a walk, until it depends on the writer’s sleep and condition. Even the practical telegram does not resolve the emotional indecision. The day ends without clarity, only a sense of wavering resolve. |
| May 28, 1873 | 94 | The trip to Weimar is finally undertaken, but it begins under a cloud of haste and fatigue. Arrival brings a world of rehearsals, exhausted hosts, and mixed reception, with complaints about the performance nearly everywhere. The social round continues late into the night, reinforcing the impression of a strained but important occasion. The whole day feels like forced movement toward a significant event. |
| May 29, 1873 | 289 | The visit revolves around social calls, family introductions, and the public meaning of Christus. The performance is described as powerful and strange, provoking both admiration and criticism, while also serving as a cultural statement about German seriousness and religious feeling. The writer and R. interpret the work as both national and spiritual, with R. reacting in extremes of enthusiasm and indignation. The evening ends in a popular, almost comic setting, where the father is seen as warm and accessible in public company. |
| May 30, 1873 | 83 | Farewells close the Weimar journey and turn the homeward route into a moment of relief and gratitude. The return is experienced not just as physical travel but as renewed attachment to Germany and its smaller towns. Home is reached peacefully, with the household asleep and well. The day ends in the comfort of being back where things feel settled. |
| May 31, 1873 | 189 | The day mixes ordinary family life with lingering reflection on the oratorio and its reception. Children, visitors, and letters occupy the domestic sphere, while the household remains cool enough to require attention to heat. There are also signs of broader concern, from the unfinished gate approval to anxious notes about illness and criticism. The entry conveys a household returning to routine while still carrying recent impressions. |
| No diary entries found. | ||