Only to-day, dear Minna, can I tell you something definite again. I shall remain here in my roomlet till the end of this month, to complete my poem without a break. Several things combine. A few days ago I had finished the first act, — a letter from Schott hadn't come; I had some happy thoughts for the opening of the second act, began it, and now shouldn't care to let a whole dreadful winter-journey with its packing and unpacking, finding lodgings, installing myself etc. in a strange place, fall between it and termination of the entire text. On the other hand, Schott begs me by letter to-day to have a little patience regarding a fresh cheque, which would incommode him for the moment. But you can easily imagine what an unforeseen plight the falling-through of the Metternich invitation has brought me into; having to swallow this bitter, bitter disappointment again, makes me quite sick and weary. I am plunging right up to the ears in my work, simply to forget the wretched world I'm placed in! —
Under such circumstances, and with my fresh all-dominating bent to work, I'm longing more than ever for a domicile again. So I shall have a thorough good look at Wiesbaden, with that intent, from next month onward. As one will perhaps be compelled to live by the labour of one's hands alone for life's remainder, and certain home-comforts, good attendance etc., are the main consideration, much less the company — which has its good and bad sides everywhere — the exact spot is becoming more and more indifferent to me, provided one has a pleasant abode, and — cheap living. So I confess — please laugh — this instant I'm even thinking of a look at that fabulous Bamberg. — There you have the sort of ideas that form a running accompaniment to my work: meanwhile, suppose you win something handsome in the lottery! —
There's another thing, however, I don't intend to leave untried. — At the end of this month I think of getting on the march; I shall travel via Carlsruhe, and announce myself to the Grand Ducals, with whom I'm on quite a good footing still, for two things: 1°, a recital of my new poem (completed by then); 2°, a performance of Lohengrin under my direction. — Remains to be seen! — The Grand Duke in any case took too grave a view of the affair, and friend Devrient will certainly have done his honest best toward that; so I shall let him know, I'll settle in his capital if he only gives me 1200 gulden a year. After all, that's something, and it will be a last attempt on my side. Shall see! —
So just write me once more; I know you have only been waiting for news of my whereabouts. —
Before I leave here I hope to see Seebach also, who is in Dresden just now. Perhaps you might call on him; in any case he'd be of most use to you. If this Saxon fix would only cease, it would be a good job in every way! —
Now excuse my writing more; as I've to send news of my decision in various directions, I still have a deal to attend to to-day.
May these lines find you in good spirits and humour! Lord knows that's needed, and if it weren't for my Apprentices, who have to open the second act, I shouldn't know where I'm to get the humour from. The saucy lads afforded me much fun in the first act before, with David as ringleader! —
So farewell, remain — or become — good to me!
Thy Richard.
Source: Richard to Minna Wagner: Letters to His First Wife, trans. William Ashton Ellis, Vol. 2 (Charles Scribner's Sons, 1909), No. 228