Sunday, November 21:
R. did not have a good night, and I, probably through overtiredness, a very agitated one. R. dreamed again about my being cold toward him, and departure. At breakfast R. says: "Worst of all is probably the indifference one feels toward everything. When I hear people talking about a work like Religion and Art, it all seems to me utter nonsense. You and the children are my only link with the world, in fact only the children, for you are 'moving with me, considering well, from Heaven through the world to Hell.'"
He finishes La Renaissance and comes to me around noon, the book in his hand, much affected by the final scene between Michelangelo and Vittoria Colonna. He gives it to me to read, and it makes a quite wonderful impression on me. How many of his characteristics can be seen in M., too, and he says he was reminded of himself when M. talks of the inordinate violence of his temperament, combined with great energy. We discuss M.'s attitude toward the Renaissance, very perceptively described by Gobineau. R. says of himself that he is the plenipotentiary of downfall, this he sees increasingly: "If my ideas were to strike root, all these great men would be listened to as teachers and would not, as it were, have lived in vain."
He goes out with Jouk. but is annoyed both with the weather and with Marke, who runs into all the houses; he takes refuge in Angermann's.
In the evening Jouk. tells us that Pepino is feeling homesick, which is only too understandable. We conclude the evening with a game of whist.