Cosima's Diaries

Diary Entry of February 2, 1872

Overview

What began as an ordinary holiday turned into a crushing tragedy when the children returned from town to report that Fitzo had been killed by a locomotive. The writer rushed to the scene, buried the dog, and was overwhelmed by guilt and grief, feeling responsible for the loss. The sight of the mangled body and the sudden silence at home left a lasting shock that she believes will never fade.

Content

Friday, February 2:

Terrible day! My children walk into town with Anna, take Fitzo with them, return home weeping, and tell me that Fitzo has been run over by the locomotive. I run to the spot and bury our poor little dog.

It is a holiday, people come and go, the sun shines, and I feel as if I were to blame for his death. Today, when the bell rang and I did not hear his barking, I felt so desolate; I cannot help thinking that recently Kos was calling Fitzo, and Fitzo heard the knocking and wanted to fly to me for protection.

I feel as if I had lost Kos twice, and the terrible sight of that poor, mangled body will never leave me.