At last, dear good Minna, I breathe again and commence to hope! — I moved in here yesterday afternoon, and now propose pursuing my thorough restoration, without which I should not care to go on living! — But first of all I must narrate to you at length, after my two brief telegrams, how things have gone with me; for which reason I have taken a large sheet of paper straight off, as a smaller would never hold even the half of what I intended to write to you. — Now for it! — First the journey! It was the unluckiest and most miserable I've ever made — unfortunately it came to a Friday while I still was en route! — From Baden in the evening on the diligence to Aarau, in an awful coupé with two stout chaps who naturally would have been choked if they hadn't opened the windows, which compelled me in turn to draw my cloak over my head and sweat like a joint in the oven. At Aarau change of carriage in the night — then the same story till Biel. There — in the morning — I hoped to be released and board the steamer; but all water-traffic had been suspended owing to the inundations, and consequently the whole advantage of this route was lost! So by coach again to Neuchâtel: terrible rain there; 2½ hours by steamer to Yverdon, in the cabin of course, the whole landscape veiled in clouds. Then it began in earnest! The steamer arrived half an hour late, and instead of taking the 1 o'clock train — which had left already — I had to wait for the 5. Good! When I get to the station, they declare that my dog must be put in the dog-box; you may imagine what a scene ensued! All my pleas, entreaties, threats, were of no avail; at last I took Fips under my arm, and tried to mount in spite of all denials: fresh uproar! Finally it was heard by some ladies who were seated in a coupé: they declared themselves perfectly willing to admit myself and puppy to their carriage; so the martinets gave way at last, and I got in with Fips in triumph — but after shameful vexation! —
That is by no means all, though! At 7 the train arrived at Morges on the Lake of Geneva; the steamer — which, if we had left Yverdon by the right train, would have brought me to Geneva in 2 hours, so that I should have arrived there by 5 — this steamer of course had long gone, and its missing would have to be remedied by a fresh journey of 5½ hours in the diligence — i.e. half another night! So I decided to stay the night at Morges, and take the first steamer next morning; but the station people had already put my luggage on the diligence, which I mistook for a mere omnibus to Morges. Pondering what's to be done, suddenly I am ordered out of the coupé into which I had mounted; my coupé ticket does not hold good here, the passengers from Lausanne have first right. Very well, say I, I shall get out and remain here; give me my luggage! — That's stowed away, they tell me, there's no time left to get it down. — A running accompaniment of rain and storm! I was beside myself, used all the bad language I could think of — but in the end was obliged to give in, as I didn't want to be left with no luggage. Which seat? Inside, the middle place back to the horses; opposite me two pedlars with big bundles on their laps, beside me a woman with an enormous hump — exactly poking my way — and added to it all, a screaming child! The best, moreover, was that the incensed conductor wouldn't even let me keep the dog: Not allowed in the intérieur, must be tied to the carriage!! I thought I should go mad! The other passengers naturally intervened, however, all burdened as they were, God knows, and Fips remained without so much as stirring — the good, well-behaved beast! That journey to Geneva was the crown of all joys, and truly I had not believed I should ever have to go through such a thing again in my life! At last I arrived, half past twelve! At 2 o'clock to bed, in hideous agitation and constant terror of another outbreak of the Roses! — There's a pleasure-trip for you!! Via Berne it would have gone almost uninterruptedly smoothly, but I wanted it pleasanter! However, it was all the inundation's fault — otherwise, and especially with fine weather, everything would have been decidedly better. — So there you have my travelling adventures! —
At Geneva a hurricane from the north raged for two days, which certainly was to bring fair weather, but made it extremely risky for me to go out. On Saturday I sent Dr R.'s letter to M. John Coindet, who had left home, however; so I followed R.'s counsel, and sent the letter with his card to the brother, Doctor Coindet: instead of appointing me an hour to consult him, he was so kind as to call at once himself. He directed me to Mornex, as the only place where I should find what I sought, and further gave me good advice about my malady. So I took a carriage on Sunday, and saw to everything; only I couldn't get consent as yet, for reasons which you shall learn in an instant. In the afternoon I returned to Geneva, and made another excursion that evening, to Cologny, to see Pastor Bourris (whom I know from Albisbrunn); but he, too, had gone for a holiday. Well, my new landlady kept me waiting until Monday evening for her answer, which turned out favourably in the event: yesterday afternoon I finally moved in. — Now let me describe my place of refuge. — Mornex — a sort of village — is two leagues from Geneva, already in Savoy; it lies on the other side of Mont Salève, half way up that mountain, which is ascended by tourists from Geneva for the sake of its beautiful view. The air is splendid, since the spot itself stands very high. I'm living at the pension Latard, in a summer-house that lies quite isolated, divided from the pension by a garden; it really is the garden salon intended as a drawing-room for the boarders. There is quite a good piano in it; which was a great consideration to me, as I should otherwise have had to get one from Geneva at huge expense. I had only one condition to agree to, for the immense favour of obtaining this pavilion to myself: every Sunday I must clear out from 9 to 12 in the morning, as the salon is arranged for Divine service then for the Genevans staying here; the parson comes, and the devil takes flight. I have to accept it with a good grace, as the other advantages are so numerous that I could have attained them nowhere else. Firstly: complete seclusion, private attendance, warm bath (enormously important!), meals to my choice; then a hydropathic institute close by, where I shall be able to have my cold baths later in the greatest comfort; still later I shall have the Arve (the river) fairly near. From my door I step direct into a pretty garden; from the window I step on to a balcony, with the most glorious view of the entire Mont Blanc range and a lovely broad valley between. — Naturally it wasn't to be had very cheap, but I must hit on some means of enjoying it as long as possible; for I need it — and it isn't to be had any else! — I have bargained for the most complete non-disturbance; except François, the waiter, I never see a soul! —
My malady indeed has made great strides; last winter it used to vanish entirely at times, and I knew no more of it for weeks: now I don't pass an hour without dreading a fresh outbreak, so that I feel myself the wretchedest of men. That must be radically altered, and I am doing everything that promises it. Dr Coindet assured me, the principal thing was the strictest dieting and rest: I might have remarked, he said, that the outbreaks were always connected with preceding errors of diet and irregularities, the results whereof I no longer experienced in my abdomen, as before, but precisely in an attack of these Roses. How right he is: I can prove it to have been so, and feel it, moreover, at last. I am therefore to live wholly by rule, never the slightest deviation; beer and the like lead direct to attacks. He has also forbidden me coffee, and that most strictly, not even half milk. (Just ask Dr R. what he says to that!) Out of doors I must avoid both wind and sun; in the sun I'm to bear an umbrella. He expects much from the air here, great repose without any excitement, and regular diet. Do tell Dr R. that no one here has ever heard of Tavaster water; Coindet recommended Laxir lemonade of a morning instead; meanwhile I stick to Carlsbad salts, two doses of which I take each morning. I'm to begin the sulphur baths to-day — God grant me restoration of my health! No sacrifice can be too great to me for that; for in this condition I'm the most unbearable of men, and can give no one any pleasure! —
To write Fips' praises I should need to take another whole sheet, the animal is so touchingly well-behaved, kind, docile and reliable! Seated on the little table, when the train left Zurich he suddenly began to howl, and kept his eyes fixed on the side from which you vanished; he took no notice of me at all, talk to him as much as I liked. When I got into the diligence he reconciled himself, and behaved so well, so quietly and quite unnoticeably throughout the journey, that I can't possibly praise him enough. But he would neither eat nor drink the first few days, and it was only with the choicest morsels that I could tempt him in the end. Even now he'll hardly take anything else; though I make him his soup at dinner-time — with tit-bits, be it said — and he's gradually coming round. He seems very pleased with this place; when I open the doors for him, he first goes and lies on the balcony, taking stock of the landscape, the people and cattle, then makes his promenade round the garden. He is watchful beyond all measure: people like him very much. — He sends best greetings! On our promenade this morning, suddenly a cuckoo was heard; he pricked up his ears and whined: he imagined it was Jacquot! — I took Pepsel's portrait with me purposely: — I shall observe the death-day of that dear good friend with all my heart! This fine weather makes me wish you would go to the Seelisberg quite soon yourself; I don't like to think of your being at home with that eternal provocation! Do go very soon. But you must take Jacquot with you — I stick to that — his big cage too: please see to it! —
Now I thank you again most kindly for your good letter; agreed, we remain the same old pair. If I could only make life thoroughly agreeable to you, and banish all provocation, how happy it would make me! So hold me dear, as I hold you; be cheerful, do all you can for your health — and hope for a right merry reunion, unruffled by the cares of illness! Farewell, good Muzius, be heartily greeted and kissed by
Thy Richard.
I've had news from Liszt that the M. family thinks of spending the summer at Zurich and seeing a lot of me: — I couldn't help laughing when Liszt expressed regret at it! Well, I have happily escaped from that, and its like!! — How fortunate that I'm away! — Give my kindest regards to the Wesendoncks; I think of writing them tomorrow or the next day. — No letters can get here direct, because there's no post here whatever; so just go on addressing poste restante, Genève. A messenger goes to Geneva every day, taking letters in, and fetching them out. —
Source: Richard to Minna Wagner: Letters to His First Wife, trans. William Ashton Ellis, Vol. 1 (H. Grevel & Co., 1909), No. 103