Dear Minna,
The Frommann has sent me no account yet of the dimensions of the present Berlin tantième. Doubtless the money is in your hands by now, and I'm anxious to know if it puts you in a position to manage till the beginning of next month. — Not before the 1st of November can I count with certainty, on my side, upon a sufficient haul; therefore I also see myself obliged to beg you most pressingly to ask Frau Pauline in my name to induce Kaskel to let the 150 thlr stand over until the 3rd November. Only on that date can I pledge my word of honour to refund this money to the lender.
The fact that not a soul has helped, or could have helped me this time, is something new to me, in a degree, and I perceive that I must take my fate into my hands another way. At this instant I'm no longer busied with the Meistersinger, but with the arranging of pieces from my other works yet unknown to the public (particularly the Nibelungen) — so as to give Grand Concerts with them, making a commencement in Vienna shortly. Despite the papers, I have no serious hope of Tristan there, as things still stand with Ander exactly as a year ago; consequently I must try something else. This means that I'm quite overwhelmed at present with the needful preparatory work for my concerts. I shall be happy if by the day of the full rehearsal for the Leipzig concert I have got the length of being able to leave here. Social forgatherings with good friends and relations are scarcely to be thought of under the circumstances.
Hard as your life seems to you, please do believe me that my own is harder. To all the straits and harassments you suffer, for me is added the reproach that I involve you in them; whereas you have a perfectly clear conscience towards myself in that regard. I too, dear Minna, am much upset, and the effect upon my spirit of the quite unprecedentedly perverse experiences of these latter times is simply heightened by my having been unable to spare you a share in them.
However — things will alter now! — And rest assured, I'll see that you have no fresh harass to suffer. —
So — tell me whether you will require anything beyond the Berlin money before November 2. — The servant's bed is being packed: it shall go off, with several other things, within the next few days; also, the wedge-bolster.
Farewell, and console yourself with me! Sad, but heartfelt greetings from
Thy Richard.
Source: Richard to Minna Wagner: Letters to His First Wife, trans. William Ashton Ellis, Vol. 2 (Charles Scribner's Sons, 1909), No. 257