My completely good Mienel,
Do not expect much from your dear husband to-day; he's utterly done up! I fancied I was in for an attack of grippe at yesterday's concert, the catarrh still plagues me so. The concert itself put me out to the last degree: I can't go into everything that annoyed me at it; enough to say, the one thing lacking is that I should have to conduct Martha again: such a programme came very near it. While conducting an aria from the Huguenots and a miserable overture by Onslow — an Englishman — I was seized by such disgust and remorse at having accepted this absurd engagement, that it got the better of me and I made up my mind to demand my definite discharge next day. After the concert I declared this aloud to my acquaintances, whereupon Lüders, Praeger and his wife, accompanied me home to make me change my intention. Over oysters, lobster salad and punch, which Lüders prepared with great art, we kept it up till past 3 in the morning, and the finale was my giving in; towards which — I scarcely need assure you — the thought of yourself, and your distress at such a step, contributed the most with me. So I mean to hold out, hard as it falls on me to have to ply this wholly useless handicraft for another 2 months. I must pay the penalty, however, for having been so stupid as to pave the way for this vexation with open eyes; a thing I still deeply repent. — So be easy about me; I shan't have so severe an attack of the dumps again, I hope! But it was the most idiotic concert of them all: a mawkish symphony by one of the directors; then a fearfully tedious nonett by Spohr; a completely insignificant overture by Weber, which — to make things worse — had to be given da capo, as I had conducted it far too finely; to conclude, the trashy overture by Onslow! — All these are purely interests of the Directors, to which I am forced to conform! — Neither did the symphony in A go so well as at Zurich by a long way; such an English orchestra simply is not to be worked into ecstasy! —
My God, I'd rather say no more about it! — Next week we have an extra rehearsal, at which (besides the Tannhäuser overture for the 5th concert) a symphony by an Englishman — Potter — then a new symphony by Spohr, expressly composed for London, and an overture by another Englishman — Macfarren — are to be got through. What bliss for me! I have been unable to bring off the Egmont music, as they can give me no more extra rehearsals. — Well, the only motto here is Patience to last out; but I could turn furious at anybody who looks for profit to me from this London adventure. As said — I have simply to do penance for a folly committed. — Eduard Röckel has invited me for Thursday to Bath, whence he will make excursions with me till Sunday; probably I shall accept, for a little distraction. It is said to be very beautiful there. I shall write you thence. — Klindworth isn't allowed to go out, even yet, which robs me of much entertainment. —
My very best thanks for your political news; I couldn't help laughing! Yes, my good Muzius, one lives better at Zurich; Lord, what a treat I mean to take at home! I can scarcely contain my anticipations of the return to Zurich, to our pretty abode, with our good humans and beasties, and its cheery mistress, Madame Wagner, who is sure to drive away the recollection of this cursed London by her thorough coddling, and so make me feel well again and up to my work, which is in a terrible rut here. —
There, Lüders is knocking, to fetch me for a walk and meal (with him and Sainton). Even so I could not have written much more, to say nothing of my always saving up for word of mouth. In my next letter I'll retrieve a little, though, especially about a performance of Romeo and Juliet at the Haymarket Theatre.
Farewell, my dear good old Minna. Be merrier than I, and reflect that we shall never be parted so stupidly again, nor for so long; a thing like this occurs but once. A thousand greetings to all friends!
Source: Richard to Minna Wagner: Letters to His First Wife, trans. William Ashton Ellis, Vol. 1 (H. Grevel & Co., 1909), No. 87