My quite good Mienel,
Even to-day I shan't arrive at writing you the promised letter, yet I mean to bring off a couple of lines at least to keep you from growing uneasy. For your last letter I thank you heartily; I see you're doing all you can to keep me in good humour. Well, it's to be hoped that my last letter, which you will have received this morning, has pacified you. Nothing whatever has happened since, neither have the papers come out with anything yet of importance; the Times has kept silence till now, though I don't know if it has printed anything to-day. It is only for you folk I mention this; if I seek information about it, it isn't that I set any store by it, but because you folk appear to. Uncle and Aunt have written me very amiably to-day: give them my heartiest thanks to go on with; anyhow I mean to set apart a day exclusively for answers soon. Then I shall also send whatever printed matter I can lay hands on; only, don't any of you expect something decent. Sulzer requests me, if anything "substantial" appears, to send it on to him: — he may have long to wait! Meantime I make him a present of his beautiful faith in English solidity and humanity: here no one shares it, and the bottomless hollowness of all modern English relations is an open secret, chirped by the very sparrows on the roofs. —
Last week I was at a performance of the "Sacred Harmonic Society," where they give religious music, oratorios etc., 25 to 30 times a year. Really that is the best music one has in England: the Requiem, indeed, was quite respectably rendered under Costa. I paid him a call on the strength of it yesterday, which appeared to please him very much. — The day before yesterday, however, I was at the New Philharmonic Society, where I heard a mass of music (including the C minor symphony) so banged about under Dr. Wylde's direction, that I felt quite ill: the Times praises it highly. It was awful! — To-day I dine with Ernst, who has married another Jewess here. Tomorrow I go to Benecke's again, where proceedings are sociably wooden, and rather audaciously wind up with music. On that I'll shortly write the Wesendoncks. — For the rest, never a lord, nor yet a lady, has taken me up; they all are very wide-awake, and none have lost their senses. —
You haven't a word of praise for my decision to let Berlin have Tannh. without conditions? As to myself, it cost me a hard struggle; for, as the matter stands and people are, doubtless I have offended Liszt deeply: he hasn't yet answered me. Still, what does one not do for money's sake? one can't stand firm for ever, especially as nobody would comprehend one's not wanting to tread on the corns even of a foible of a friend so proved in other ways. The Frommann has written me as if gone crazy; I had two letters on one day from her. Well, Hr. v. Hülsen means ardently to back my wish for an advance of 100 L. d'or; what more can one ask? —
I've also written to my Dresden draper. Now I'm in London, all the world deems me rolling in riches again. Franck of Paris, too, has politely reminded me of my old debt, which I should really like to pay him from my savings here. So it keeps on, dear Mienel: we shall never alight on a green twig — we must abandon that idea; neither will there be any extra windfall for me here. God knows what will be the end of it; the best way is to lose the trick of living, which somehow does not seem given one for joy. I'm always offering all I have, and lavishing the whole of my powers — I feel that in my poor body! — but towards me everything is leathern, coy, or common. I suppose that's how it's bound to be! Only the Jews and scamps can make money as "artists" nowadays; one sees that here. —
For the rest, I'm leading a very retired life of it: work is going fairly, my sole remaining joy! but when at it, I daren't think of the fate of my works. — Don't fret about me, though; I'm still keeping afloat. I slept well last night for once at least; only, I've caught a fresh cold, and no wonder after the concert. — Please don't frank any more; it distresses me. The Messieurs Directors have just sent 50 pounds into my house for the first two concerts, which will carry me a long way; if they repeat it soon, Wesendonck shall have his 1000 fr. out of it. For you we'll wait for Berlin now. — If I feel comfortable in the next few days, I will write you a nice letter. Many thanks again for yours.
Farewell, dear old girl, and distribute kind regards.
Thy Richard.
Source: Richard to Minna Wagner: Letters to His First Wife, trans. William Ashton Ellis, Vol. 1 (H. Grevel & Co., 1909), No. 81