Dearest friend,
Have you all forgotten me? I have felt so lonely of late that I am often afraid. Should you be angry with me about anything? perhaps about the absurd misunderstanding with B.? He wrote to me that he had heard that I was annoyed at his great article on Lohengrin. I was quite confounded, and thought that some misapprehension of an expression in one of my letters might have led you and B. after you to a completely erroneous opinion about me. Therefore I requested him to ask you in my name to let him explain to you the passage in my letter, because I was anxious, not only for his sake, but for yours, to dispel so ugly an error. Has any unpleasantness resulted from it?
From Brussels I have heard nothing. Could you give me some news, or are you angry that I have troubled you with this affair? Anyhow I have no illusions as to Brussels.
My very stout book is ready. Its title is Oper und Drama. I have not yet a publisher; and as I must take care to get a little money for it, I am a little anxious about the matter.
Next month I shall devote to the edition of my three romantic opera-poems. A longish introduction will explain the origin of these poems and their position towards music.
At the beginning of spring I hope to commence the composition of Siegfried, and to continue the work without interruption.
As to the rest, my pleasure in life is not great. All is quiet and lonely around me, and I frequently feel as if I were dead and forgotten.
But how are you? Have you quite recovered? I frequently dream of Weimar and of you—wild, confused things.
Let us say nothing more about Wiland; I am heartily sorry that—you are right.
Have you still courage? Are you in good spirits? Do you really still care to live amongst the majestic people of the Philistines who rule the world nowadays? Ah! as long as we possess fancy we can pull along somehow.
My poor dear little parrot is also dead! He was my spiritus familiaris, the good brownie of my house.
Farewell, and forgive me.
Source: Project Gutenberg eBook #3835, Correspondence of Wagner and Liszt — Volume 1, No. 55