Dearest Mother,
You must have been long expecting a letter from me, particularly since although you were here we did not see each other. It was not till the evening after your departure that I discovered from Eichberger that you had been here. I heard from Fräulein Gerhard that you stayed here with Mme. Berthold, but I did not quite believe it and thought that if you had really come you would have communicated with Laube, since you could not know where I was living. I went to see Laube; he knew nothing of your arrival and doubted it, too, and then I fell quite out of the clouds when, at last and too late, I learnt of it from Eichberger. So far as I could discover from him, my letter from Magdeburg must have missed you in Leipzig, and that was doubly ill-hearing to me, for you cannot have known that I intended to go to Berlin. Well, ill-luck and misadventure have been and are my portion. I still shudder when I think of it all. My Berlin expedition has at last propitiated my evil star a little. I and Cerf are the warmest friends in the world and embrace whenever we see each other. The man took a liking to me and at once regretted that he had concluded another year's contract with the director of music, Kugler. So the present position is that Kapellmeister Glaser has long leave of absence in the summer and during this time I temporarily hold his post and salary. During my time at the helm I shall rehearse my opera here and produce it and lay down my office when Glaser returns. I must take on some new engagement for the period immediately following, but by then I hope to hold a contract with Cerf to act for alternating periods as kapellmeister from next year on, while, at the worst, I shall have made myself known here and can withdraw with advantage. Laube and the journalists who work in his interests—such as Glasbrenner, for instance—are making a terrific hue and cry about me as if I were the greatest genius in the world, and you could have read all the news I have given you here just as well in the society papers. It can't be helped, I must try my fortune locally, and this kind of thing is just what I needed. I dare not come to Leipzig—the air there is not good for me. I hope this will reassure you a little, if you need reassurance.
So Clara is with you, the dear, good creature! But how is her husband? In my terrible necessity and despair I wrote to him from Magdeburg, but got no answer. Wohlbrück is here from Riga. A new theatre is to be built and opened there in the autumn. Perhaps I may go there. But first I want to make a name here! Forgive me—I must go and see my good friend Spontini or the fellow will have the house about my ears with his perpetual visits! He is beside himself because he cannot produce my opera. Why has he come too late? I can't help him! The King, who is my good friend, has offered me Spontini's post, but what use is it to me? Six journalists want interviews with me this minute. People crowd upon me. I can't endure that much longer, particularly as I haven't a farthing in my pocket. My good friend Theodore Apel, too, sent me a very charming unfranked letter at Magdeburg, in which he wrote that building was in progress at Ermlitz and so there was really no room for me there. I think it must have been a new jest out of his latest comedy. Often enough, dear Mother, I have suspected even you a little of having set that fellow on me. I have my reasons for that.
Now, you see how splendidly things are going with your son. Cerf, among others, hardly knows what to do for love of me—he will certainly cut his heirs out of his will and put me there instead. He often weeps out the sorrows of his managership on my bosom. He is an abject fellow, but useful all the same to the man who knows how to manage him. My whole policy at present is directed to getting Glaser to the baths as soon as possible. He must get a thorough chill somehow, for I believe he is not at all intemperate. May God assist me! [...]
Source: Letters of Richard Wagner, Vol. 1, selected and ed. Wilhelm Altmann, trans. M. M. Bozman (J. M. Dent & Sons, 1927), No. 37