Dear and most honoured friend and patron,
How anxious and uneasy I feel! My exalted benefactor’s non-attendance at the performances of Parsifal (an absence which I must unfortunately interpret as involuntary!), together with the news of his intention of staging a private performance in circumstances which I consider far from promising, leaves me feeling deeply dispirited. It is impossible in this way for my supreme protector to gain the same sort of impression of my work as I believed I had prepared for him with the performances in Bayreuth. If, however, our most gracious lord is satisfied with this, it is more than likely that I shall lose all interest in reviving Parsifal and in continuing to perform the work even in Bayreuth. Why should I make so much effort, if it can all be done so easily without me, in private? -
In your recent kind letter to my wife you intimated that you cherished the hope of perhaps receiving His Majesty’s instructions to visit Venice. How desirable it is that this hope should be realized. Perhaps I may be accorded the gracious communication which will relieve me of many of my cares? For I do not see how I can continue the festival without incurring considerable risk, unless I can be given my exalted protector’s generous support for another two years and be granted free use of the royal orchestra and chorus. I fully understand, however, the great sacrifice which would have to be made here on behalf of my enterprise, and - how can I cheerfully accept that sacrifice if I cannot give my sovereign benefactor any pleasure by doing so? -
You see, I am in a very real dilemma: is there no word of comfort you could give me? —
A thousand heartfelt good wishes to Him and His loyal servant!
In eternal gratitude,
Your most obedient servant,
Richard Wagner
Source: Selected Letters of Richard Wagner, trans. and ed. Stewart Spencer and Barry Millington (W. W. Norton & Company, 1988), No. 499