My dear friend,
Some time ago you asked me whether my situation was desperate? I denied that it was, since I had just then reached the point when I hoped that revenues from the German theatres would set me afloat. On the basis of last year’s experiences, and in response to favourable indications that I had already received, I believed that during the months of August and September, when theatres are normally planning novelties for the winter season, I would receive at least sufficient monies to pay off my most pressing debts during that time, and that I should easily be able to discharge the others in the course of the ensuing months. The period that I had fixed for the fulfilment of these hopes has now elapsed, and I can no longer conceal from myself the fact that my calculations have been proved wrong. The hope that I might now receive considerable revenues as a result of the confluence of a large number of orders has most decidedly not been fulfilled. The reason for this, however, is the result of chance and will not last: all theatres are now going through a bad patch; and, in the short term, I expect I have a rival in the new Meyerbeer opera. You know my relations with Berlin. Since my operas have always been successful and have made money wherever they were given, I may not be altogether wrong in supposing that my hope that, in the course of time, all theatres will acquire the performing rights to them rests upon reasonable assumptions, so that I do not in fact need to regard my financial circumstances as being in any way reduced as a result of the delay that I have now had to suffer. In other words, if I had the time and leisure to wait, this autumn’s unfortunate outcome might not have had too serious repercussions on my present situation. But things are quite different here: I simply cannot hold out at the present time nor in the immediate future, unless I receive a large sum of money in cash.
My debts are the result of furnishing my rooms here in the course of last year. The silent or spoken reproaches which I have brought upon myself in consequence of the nature of these furnishings are something which - now that it has come to this - I am incapable of refuting except by appealing to certain processes within me which I fear I shall never be able to explain to anyone who cannot himself sympathize with the essential character of my nature and of my present situation under the impressions of that period and in the face of an incipient artistic task of the kind and extent that I then had in mind. I shall therefore say nothing on the subject, but freely admit that anyone who accuses me of folly may well be right. I am also quite prepared to atone for this act of folly, as I have indeed already atoned for it with some harshness through suffering the most disgusting cares and worries. And I am also willing to give up my new furnishings: since I can no longer afford to maintain them, I attach so little importance to them that I could sell them all and feel only the most utter indifference. Indeed, unless I receive special help, there seems to be no other way of appeasing my creditors, except by offering them the proceeds of my entire household, which would then have to be immediately given up. But it goes without saying that, if I am not to suffer appalling humiliation, such a sale must inevitably entail my definitive departure from Zurich: by way of an excuse, I would have to plead the need to change my place of residence and go away from here - and go, moreover, as far away as possible. However much I have come to like Zurich, especially through the friends I have made here, I am nevertheless willing to atone for my carelessness by leaving, - whether with bitterness and pain? - that must be for me to say. But - my wife would not be able to bear such a move; I know she would succumb, indeed, I believe it could be the death of her.
I must therefore do everything possible to prevent this from happening. That is why I am now turning to you. Here you have an account of my position.
I have made a precise reckoning, and find that I need “ten thousand francs” in order to discharge all my debts - but not including my debt to you. I owe around seven thousand francs here for unpaid bills, most of which have been repeatedly demanded and which I have now promised to settle within the course of this month. The remainder is a more recent debt which I owe Karl Ritter, who was able to advance me the money only on condition that he receives it back by the end of this coming October. (I may add in passing that I still owe you an explanation of certain recent statements of mine concerning my debts.)
If some means were to be offered me now whereby I could obtain this sum, I would surrender the revenues due to me from the various German theatres until such time as the sum is repaid. I have indicated on the accompanying sheet what I may expect here: in drawing up the list I have relied solely on past experience and not reckoned on the fees being as high as some that have already been paid me in similar circumstances, so that the total may easily be more - particularly if we are able to proceed with all due calm. The minimum sum which I expect to receive for my two operas “Tannhäuser” and “Lohengrin” may therefore be reckoned, without the least exaggeration, at 21,000 frs., which ignores - for reasons I do not need to go into - the revenues which I hope one day to receive from Berlin.
If some agreement could be reached, I should be glad to see you yourself placed in charge of these receipts. But since it would be as difficult for you as it would for anyone else to superintend the sale of my operas, I myself would have to function more or less as a secretary, seeing to all the correspondence and ensuring that all remittances were simply addressed to you, possibly under the pretext that the monies would be safer if sent that way.
There is only one condition I would make here: a yearly allowance of 2000 frs., paid in quarterly instalments over a period of three years, would have to be deducted from these revenues and made available to me to pay for my household expenses, since I could not get by otherwise; and in order to prevent me from falling straightaway into further disorganization, these advances would have to begin this coming 1st of October.
(I ought also to draw your attention to the fact that I have not included in the aforementioned sum of 10,000 fr. a further figure of 500 fr. which I am obliged to pay tomorrow (the 15th September) and for which I am daily awaiting the necessary money from Breslau, as honorarium for my Lohengrin (which is why I have not included it in the accompanying list). Since, at the time of writing, this money has still not arrived, I now find myself in the embarrassing position of having to ask you, if possible, to advance me the necessary 500 fr. until such time as I am in receipt of the same.)
Now, my dear friend, you must consider how best to go about helping me in order to avert what would otherwise be a terrible catastrophe, particularly as regards my wife. From Germany I cannot — and will not — look for anything at present, in spite of a few vague prospects that have been opened up to me there: if anything is to be done to help me, it can spring forth only from dealings with friends such as exist only in one’s immediate surroundings.
Look at me! I can no longer help myself, since everything is now so pressing, and since I cannot, in the immediate future, abandon myself to the random chance of agreeable surprises.
You may be assured, finally, that I am heartily sorry for the trouble which I know I must be causing you herewith.
Yours,
Richard Wagner.
Source: Selected Letters of Richard Wagner, trans. and ed. Stewart Spencer and Barry Millington (W. W. Norton & Company, 1988), No. 174