Cosima's Diaries

Diary Entry of January 9, 1883

Overview

Despite a good night's sleep, Wagner is in a deeply unsettled state all day, suffering a morning spasm and spending the afternoon and evening in mounting ill-humor, which finally erupts into anger over Liszt's disruptive habits and the cramped living quarters. Cosima can only soothe him through silent suffering, offering no words that might further inflame his mood. As a small aside, she notes his oddly critical opinion that Countess Donhoff's dark eyes and hair are "unwomanly."

Content

Tuesday, January 9:

R. slept well, but he is in a disturbed state of mind, and I must feel glad that our friend stays away! Everything upsets him. He has a spasm in the morning and at lunch is all but silent. He starts a letter to the King.

In the afternoon he goes out; I wait in the antechamber to greet him, but he is in an ill-humour, and in the evening this turns into anger. My father's manners and customs, the whist table, the constriction of our living space, all the disturbance arising from his visit — this makes him furious, and long, long after it is past he gives way to his anger, which I can only assuage by suffering with him in silence!

As a curiosity I might note down that R. considers the black eyes and hair of our friend to be unwomanly.