Saturday, January 8:
Woke up in the night, remembered Hans's birthday; if I had thought solely of him, lived only for him, would this have been better in a moral sense? I believe it would, but I also firmly believe that it was not my mission in life. My hopes are founded on Loulou's cherishing her father above all others for my sake and devoting her life to him.
R. worried over the lack of progress in our affairs, also worried on Fidi's account. Lusch still in bed, but the doctor unconcerned. Foehn, very oppressive weather. In Munich they have engaged Lucile Grahn, and work is continuing on Die Walküre, according to the Musikalische Zeitung.
Played a comedy for the children at Lusch's bedside. Nice letter from Claire; the French are satisfied with the Ollivier government.
In the evening, looking at the stars, I thought out the following poem:
Zum 8ten Januar
Ihr ruhigen Sterne grüsst aus der Ferne
des Armen Nacht!
Entsendet euer Licht,
dass nicht mehr er ficht
gen Schicksals Macht!
Enthüllt end'gen Tanz,
dass er genese ganz
von jeder Erdentaumelqual,
und sich ergebe fromm dem Leiden,
wie es komm',
erblickend das Sternental.
["You peaceful stars, greet from afar the poor one's night! Send your light, that he may no longer fight against the power of Fate! Display eternal dance, that he recover quite from the frenzies of this mortal life and piously accept suffering as it comes, gazing on the starry vale."]