Thursday, October 7:
Birth of the second Stocker child. I assist Vreneli and am terribly moved by the sight of a creature coming into the world. Why are we so badly told in our youth what the world and life are like?
Letter from the maid in Munich; I receive some money from the sale and hear that Hans is on his way to Italy. I cannot hear his name mentioned without trembling in my heart.
I write to Judith and am afterward so tired that I have to spend the whole day in bed. This greatly affects R., and he reproves me for not sufficiently looking after myself. I should not tend Siegfried during the night, he says, but I feel I must and can do this.
Our mood, viewed from without, is a completely hopeless one.